Hey! You know what? It will be a great experience regardless. I was really nervous when I went wedding dress shopping too! I wanted to throw up. It certainly wasn’t when I had planned on going wedding dress shopping. I wanted to get lose weight first, yada yada.
I’m really open about speaking about what happened to me because I don’t want other women to learn what I learned the hard way. I weighed probably 170-180 lbs in HS at 5 ft. My mom did everything she could to make me lose weight, and I did for a while. I was really glad that I lost weight, but I was also really unhappy. I had an eating disorder, and my mom had encouraged me to have that bad relationship with food. Once upon a time, she wished I would stop eating. She wanted me to be as skinny as she was at my age. She would look at other Asian girls, and feel sad that I didn’t look like them. And eventually, I did stop eating. I hated food. It made me sick. My hair was falling out, and I was skinnier than all of my friends. I was in the gym every day of the week for 6-7 hours a day. I couldn’t stop obsessing over losing weight. Eventually I did collapse, and my mom wishes that she could take it all back, that she hadn’t taken the first steps to getting me that way. I was so skinny, and so incredibly unhappy.
I’m only human, sometimes I swing back and forth between feeling great about myself and feeling bad about myself. We all have insecurities. Would I like to lose some weight? Yes! But now it’s not because I want to be so skinny, just like how we’re told we should be. It’s because I want to be healthier. I’d like to lose a few pounds so I’m able to run a block to catch the bus without feeling I’m going to pass out. I want to be able to climb the four flights of stairs to my apartment without getting so winded I can barely make it the last stretch of the way.
Don’t “diet” because it will only hurt your relationship with food and how you feel about yourself. Now I’m able to enjoy food again, without feeling like I want to claw it out of my skin because I feel guilty for eating. If you want to lose weight, do it in a healthy way, slow and steady with exercise and eating healthier. Never starve yourself or skip out on meals because it will only slow down your metabolism, and cause stomach problems for you. Get your fiancee, friends, or family to help you. Find ways to exercise that are fun and social, like dancing, yoga, etc … Eat healthier, but also indulge yourself from time to time. One of my good friends has lost weight steadily over the years, and she has dark chocolate with berries every night! Don’t set ridiculous goals for yourself like, I want to lose 50 lbs before I get married. Stop measuring yourself on the scale to see if the pounds are melting off! Try to see the subtle changes that might be happening while you’re exercising (healthily, not obsessively!). Maybe you’ll think, hey, I might not weigh 20 lbs less, but I can see that my butt looks more toned and perky! Hey, my butt looks really good! Small snacks like yogurt and nuts are good between small meals to help stabilize your blood sugar, or keep you full if you do get hungry. Eating more small meals and snacks will also help boost your metabolism because having to digest more meals means that your metabolism is working.
I originally lost probably around 60lbs in 1 year. I’ve gained half of that back. When I put those wedding dresses on, I didn’t care like I thought I would. I thought, hey, I look beautiful. I tried on all the dresses that I never thought I would even look at because they just weren’t my style. And I thought I looked great in all of them. That didn’t necessarily help me know what I want. I definitely didn’t have that moment where I knew “this is the one!” In fact it was the opposite. I thought “wow these could all be the one, they’re all so pretty!” But your first trip doesn’t have to be your last trip. It could just help you get closer to what you think you want.
Enjoy your first trip! You’re getting married! Denying yourself food, and making yourself unhappy isn’t worth it because you should be happy all the way! A happy bride is a beautiful bride! Don’t forget to sleep early and catch lots of Zzz’s because beautiful skin is so much more important than how much you weigh on your wedding day. ^_^