(Closed) 1st Time Dress Shopping Today-Nervous and Overwhelmed

posted 6 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Bee
1433 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Historic Lougheed House

You’ll be fine!!  I’m bigger than you and was able to try on a lot of dresses. 

Seriously, they just pretty much leave the dress gaping open at the back, but it looks good in the front. 

If you have a pair of spanx that can be pulled up to right under your bra, wear those.  That way your back isn’t naked if the dress doesn’t shut. 

But I bet your gonna be fine.  

Post # 4
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Awww…don’t get too worked up about it! Just relax and have fun! And just because some of us Bee’s had bad experiences with going to DB, it does not mean you will!

Kudos on going during the week. It shouldn’t be as busy!

Post # 5
Member
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

-Go in with an open mind: You might end up loving a dress that you wouldn’t expect to (strapless, corsets, mermaids. Who knows?)

-Have your budget in mind & stick to it. This is not the time to “fall in love” with something that’s triple your budget.

-Love yourself: this is the body you have, you’re working to make it the best it can be but ultimately you can only change it so much. The dress you’re buying will be for your current body & accepting snide remarks from mom will only hinder the whole process.

Post # 6
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My advice is to relax and enjoy the experience. Not all the dresses are going to fit perfectly or well, that’s okay. Laugh and move on. Not everything is going to look good, and that’s okay too.

It helps to remember that even for skinny girls, not everything looks good on everyone. There’s no shame in every dress not looking amazing! There are LOTS of dresses for plus size girls that are beautiful.

You will find tons of dresses that look great and I really hope you find your dress today!!! Good luck!

 

Post # 8
Member
5075 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

I had a wonderful experience at DB!

Go in with an open mind and try not to stress.  Have fun!   Good Luck!

I’m a curvy girl and I ROCKED the DB dresses.  LOL.  They lose something on the models.  Kiss

Post # 9
Member
803 posts
Busy bee

Hey! You know what? It will be a great experience regardless. I was really nervous when I went wedding dress shopping too! I wanted to throw up. It certainly wasn’t when I had planned on going wedding dress shopping. I wanted to get lose weight first, yada yada. 

I’m really open about speaking about what happened to me because I don’t want other women to learn what I learned the hard way. I weighed probably 170-180 lbs in HS at 5 ft. My mom did everything she could to make me lose weight, and I did for a while. I was really glad that I lost weight, but I was also really unhappy. I had an eating disorder, and my mom had encouraged me to have that bad relationship with food. Once upon a time, she wished I would stop eating. She wanted me to be as skinny as she was at my age. She would look at other Asian girls, and feel sad that I didn’t look like them. And eventually, I did stop eating. I hated food. It made me sick. My hair was falling out, and I was skinnier than all of my friends. I was in the gym every day of the week for 6-7 hours a day. I couldn’t stop obsessing over losing weight. Eventually I did collapse, and my mom wishes that she could take it all back, that she hadn’t taken the first steps to getting me that way. I was so skinny, and so incredibly unhappy. 

I’m only human, sometimes I swing back and forth between feeling great about myself and feeling bad about myself. We all have insecurities. Would I like to lose some weight? Yes! But now it’s not because I want to be so skinny, just like how we’re told we should be. It’s because I want to be healthier. I’d like to lose a few pounds so I’m able to run a block to catch the bus without feeling I’m going to pass out. I want to be able to climb the four flights of stairs to my apartment without getting so winded I can barely make it the last stretch of the way. 

Don’t “diet” because it will only hurt your relationship with food and how you feel about yourself. Now I’m able to enjoy food again, without feeling like I want to claw it out of my skin because I feel guilty for eating. If you want to lose weight, do it in a healthy way, slow and steady with exercise and eating healthier. Never starve yourself or skip out on meals because it will only slow down your metabolism, and cause stomach problems for you. Get your fiancee, friends, or family to help you. Find ways to exercise that are fun and social, like dancing, yoga, etc … Eat healthier, but also indulge yourself from time to time. One of my good friends has lost weight steadily over the years, and she has dark chocolate with berries every night! Don’t set ridiculous goals for yourself like, I want to lose 50 lbs before I get married. Stop measuring yourself on the scale to see if the pounds are melting off! Try to see the subtle changes that might be happening while you’re exercising (healthily, not obsessively!). Maybe you’ll think, hey, I might not weigh 20 lbs less, but I can see that my butt looks more toned and perky! Hey, my butt looks really good! Small snacks like yogurt and nuts are good between small meals to help stabilize your blood sugar, or keep you full if you do get hungry. Eating more small meals and snacks will also help boost your metabolism because having to digest more meals means that your metabolism is working. 

I originally lost probably around 60lbs in 1 year. I’ve gained half of that back. When I put those wedding dresses on, I didn’t care like I thought I would. I thought, hey, I look beautiful. I tried on all the dresses that I never thought I would even look at because they just weren’t my style. And I thought I looked great in all of them. That didn’t necessarily help me know what I want. I definitely didn’t have that moment where I knew “this is the one!” In fact it was the opposite. I thought “wow these could all be the one, they’re all so pretty!” But your first trip doesn’t have to be your last trip. It could just help you get closer to what you think you want. 

Enjoy your first trip! You’re getting married! Denying yourself food, and making yourself unhappy isn’t worth it because you should be happy all the way! A happy bride is a beautiful bride! Don’t forget to sleep early and catch lots of Zzz’s because beautiful skin is so much more important than how much you weigh on your wedding day. ^_^

 

Post # 10
Member
2893 posts
Sugar bee

Ditto everything above. Don’t worry. My friend just got her dress from DB earlier this year and we had a wonderful experience. Every store on the planet has a customer who wasn’t happy, that’s just life. But I’m sure you’ll be fine. Try to enjoy the experience. Congrats on the weight loss! It was already mentioned, but 100% true, not matter what your body type or weight, there is always going to be something that doesn’t work and something that makes you look like a total hottie. Being open to options is a great way to make sure you come out of there looking fabulous. 🙂

Post # 11
Member
44 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Don’t stress out. I was worried too, but you’re the same size as me and I had a wonderful time at David’s Bridal.  I was thrilled that they had sample dresses in my size and I could actually see how I would look.  Plus, I think everyone can look amazing in a wedding dress if they find the style that flatters their shape.  I echo the post above about trying on things you might have not expected.  I assumed I would want a ballgown or A-line dress because I’d want to hide my hips.  I even showed my fiance pictures of mermaid and trumpet gowns and said “you will NOT be seeing me in one of these dresses, my butt would never fit!!”  Well, the consultant suggested that I try on a gown that was fitted a bit around my hips (I think that’s trumpet??) and it actually made me look smaller, because the dress showed exactly where my hips were – the other dresses didn’t hide my hips so much as make the problem even worse.  So, while you should totally stand your ground and only buy something that makes you feel gorgeous, do be open minded about what you try on.  I’m so glad that I was.

Post # 12
Member
11356 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Have fun, take your time, and don’t allow anyone to pressure you (and don’t pressure yourself!) into buying a dress until you have found the one that you want. I am not a sample size either, and I thought that my options would really be limited, so I didn’t do too much looking. In hindsight, I wish I had taken more time and gone to more bridal shops. 

Don’t be upset when the consultant tells you what size you will need to order.  I had to order a wedding gown two sizes larger than my street size.  This is very common.

Definitely think about what will look good in your pics, not just to your eyes in the bridal salon. 

Less is more in terms of having too many things “going on” on the dress.

If you love a particular gown but just don’t like something about it, check to see if the manufacturer can adjust that particular component for the dress that you order.

Consider how you feel physically in the dress.  Is it too heavy to move in? Does the fabric allow your skin to breathe?

Those are just some thoughts.  Have fun!

Post # 13
Member
468 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Davids has some great new dresses and you should show off your curves if you are curvy! Just think girls without curves want them! I hope you find the perfect dress 🙂 Let us know how it goes!

Post # 14
Hostess
11246 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@OzToCaBride: Enjoy it! You may not cry – I cried when I put the first one on, which incidentally confused me as I thought I’d found the one, but no, when I did find the one I danced around in it.

Post # 15
Hostess
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I didn’t end up finding “my” dress at David’s, but I had a perfectly fine experience there! Don’t go in with the expectation that it won’t go well. Be positive, and hopefully it will rub off of the consultant who works with you. 🙂

I think all of us have a bit of a size-phobia when trying on dresses. But I noticed that, during my shopping experience, the importance of the event and the beauty of the dress made my fears kind of evaporate. You’ll see yourself as a beautiful bride, no matter what size you are.

Good luck!

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