1st time pregnant wino

posted 2 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 31
Member
2579 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

The books say you can still have a small glass of wine. There is no need to entirely abstain, certainly after the third trimester.

Then I suppose you need to develop a taste for grape juice in a wine glass!

Post # 32
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

lynniestar :  did you drive during pregnancy? If you got in car crash, could you imagine feeling it was worth the risk? Statistically speaking, that’s a much higher risk than having any adverse affects from one glass of wine.

Post # 33
Member
237 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

We just told everyone when we were at an event we’d normally drink at. Except work, I told the waitress and she brought me mocktails. I wanted to share my happy news and if something did go wrong, I wanted my family and friends to be able to support me for that too. So the secret thing wasn’t a problem, the bigger problem is that I just really love wine and miss it. I normally would have a glass or three at a time maybe every three weeks, but I really enjoy it! 

Post # 34
Member
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m not sure if your a US or U.K bee but I’m 18 weeks and recently discovered this 0.5% white https://www.tesco.com/groceries/en-GB/products/295236863 Of course it can never replace the real deal (it tastes a little like lemon juice but with a bit more of a…winey..edge!!) A small glass of this at the weekend has at least made me feel like I’m part of the adult world again HAha! I was getting so sick of sugary drinks as I’m not a fan in ‘non pregnant’ life. Also I’m sooo missing a glass of prosecco but so far haven’t found any convincing non alcoholic alternatives 🙁 

Post # 35
Member
9192 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i’m a beer drinker and after struggling for 2 years to conceive, i would happily of chopped off my arm to be successful.  luckily, i didn’t have to resort to that and our 2nd IVF cycle took.

that being said, i had a couple sips of wine or beer here and there.  if my husband or friend was drinking either, i would ask for a sip.

i am now pregnant with #2 (also IVF pregnancy) and when i was 18ish weeks pregnant.  we went to trivia night at a brewery.   my husband of course got a beer and i took a taste.  then the craving came back. my husband’s team came in 2nd place and they took home a case of beer.  he joked that he thought i would open my own bottle when i got home.  but for the next couple of days, i made him drink just so i could have a sip, then it was out of my system. 

 

Post # 36
Member
775 posts
Busy bee

I LOVED wine pre-pregnancy and used to drink it a couple times a week and honestly I stopped wanting it after I got pregnant. First I was really sick and the thought of alcohol made me nauseous and then I just haven’t really wanted any wine. There is this one drink that is like an after dinner coffee drink with 151 and other liqueurs in it that I’ve been craving but I’m obviously waiting on that until baby is out.

As for wine, I’ll be in my third trimester in two weeks and then if I want some I’ll have a half glass of wine or a couple sips of beer. I’m definitely of the more laid-back approach to pregnancy, I’ve been eating lunch meat and sushi and haven’t changed the way that I have my steaks cooked. I think you have to do what feels right to you.

Post # 37
Member
518 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

kittysparkles :  Perfect advice about the mock drinks / slyly ordering without liquor and pretending to drink it!

I am not pregnant yet but plan to TTC next year. While I do drink almost daily now, I want a baby pretty bad and have no worries I can abstain when I get to that point. BUT, my personal life and friendships revolve around a lot of alcohol sadly, and my girlfriends WOULD notice if I went out with them and did not drink. I have always been concerned about giving it away before I am ready! For sure will use this advice when the time comes to just drink soda / mixers in a cocktail glass until I am ready to announce it. 

Post # 38
Member
64 posts
Worker bee

CityBearBride :  Have you heard doctors recommend that no driving is safe as a blanket statement? I wasn’t trying to be confrontational. As a few physicians have stated on this board, the official stance is that NO alcohol is safe. And because you asked, I very rarely drive during pregnancy.  I suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum for the first half of my pregnancies and was on bedrest for other complications for almost or all of my third trimesters. On those extended bedrests I strictly obeyed the doctors orders that NO driving was safe. It was extremely inconvenient for me and my family. What can I say, I’m a rule follower. I worry about so many things during those nine months that I can not control, keeping my baby safe from FAS or other cognitive issues associated with alocohol consumption seems like an easy choice. Sorry you were so annoyed with my response. 

Post # 39
Member
1225 posts
Bumble bee

plprincess99 :  I awarded myself a PhD in fake drinking after I successfully hid my lack of drinking for 15 weeks, while still managing to go to bars/restaurants etc very regularly (once a week at least – my friends are a drinking crowd lol).

– Get to bars/restaurants early (or call ahead) and tell the staff you are pregnant and would like to be served mocktails, regardless of what you order in front of your friends.  The staff was never fazed by this request (guess it happens pretty frequently!).  It even worked at a wine bar – they had a sparkling non-alcoholic cider that I pretended was sparkling wine.  That said, if it isn’t too out of character, order common drinks like rum and Coke or gin and tonic to avoid people asking to taste your delicious cocktail!

– If it isn’t the kind of place you can easily make this request (e.g. a rowdy dive bar), make sure to be unavailable when everyone is ordering drinks (e.g. go to the bathroom) and then order on your own.

Avoid situations like seated dinners at home, because there are no distractions.  Unless everyone is doing self pour and the alcohol is in a different area, I don’t see how you can fake it in that scenario.

In terms of surviving with abstaining, I will say it was surprisingly easy and this was something I had worried about for years because I’m definitely a drinker! In the first tri I was struggling with mild aversions to pretty much everything, including the smell of alcohol, so it never crossed my mind. The second tri I got my energy and appetite back but I was surprised at how disinterested I was in drinking.  I was going out to bars very regularly and would ask the bartenders to make me mocktails, which has now made me believe that the mark of a good bar/bartender is how good their nonalcoholic drinks are, because anyone can make something tasty with booze!  As an aside, food was a bigger problem for me in the second tri: keeping myself from eating sushi/cold cuts/soft cheeses etc was and continues to be a struggle.

I’m now in my 35th week (4.5 weeks to go!) and I think it was around week 30 when for the first time since I got pregnant I thought to myself “I could do with a drink” after a rough day at work.  But by this point you’re in the home stretch: if you are comfortable indulging in a drink this is the safest time and if you are not comfortable, then its pretty easy to remind yourself that you have managed 6 months, so what is another 3?

Good luck!

Post # 40
Member
2523 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I LOVE wine and I just had a baby- so I am familiar with that all for sure.  I still went to restaurants and even bars when I was feeling up to it.  I would usually have a coke or a sprite, but after awhile that got old- I just wanted something fancy, so I actually started researching mocktails and ordering those.  At home I often drank fizzy juices.  

Post # 41
Member
2662 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

For at home, drink juice, lemonade, whatever out of a fancy glass you’d normally put booze in, like a wine glass or tumbler. For out in public carry a flast of Pom Juice in your purse, take your glass of red wine to the bathroom, say a quick appology to the wine, dump it out in the toilet or sink, and refill with Pom juice. Or fill a beer bottle with water (can use an empty one of hubby’s, reapply the cap as best you can, and take it to a friends house for yourself). “BYOB”

Post # 42
Member
73 posts
Worker bee

Sneaky tip for those who are trying to hide that they’re not drinking – abuse Instagram! Your friends might not be as suss on you if they’ve just seen you post on Instagram a cute pic of you and your hubby with glasses of champagne. I feel like there are lots of occasions where posting a photo of you “drinking” on Instagram would work – day out at a sports event with a beer! Anniversary dinner with husband and champagne! Fun day at a winery! Husband came home and surprised me with my favourite bottle of wine, he knows me so well! Etc. 😉 

Other idea: if you’re somewhere where you can’t disguise your drink by ordering just a coke instead of rum and coke, or somewhere where you can’t tip it out secretly anywhere…this is the perfect time to groan dramatically and say you’re not drinking for a week because you went SO HARD the night before at dinner with your husband…before you knew it one glass turned into five and you woke up feeling awful! Please don’t even let me LOOK at another glass tonight, I’m still hungover and I think I might barf.

Post # 43
Member
3224 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

 CityBearBride :  I don’t particularly care what other moms do or did while they were pregnant, but to be fair, for most people in our society, avoiding driving for 9 months is unrealistic. Avoiding alcohol for 9 months is certainly not impossible. 

Post # 44
Member
1592 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I’m not a big drinker, but Darling Husband and I enjoy a joint after work to relax. We are TTC and have given up smoking and it suuuuucks. We’ve been short tempered all week because our method of relaxation is gone. I feel your pain!

Post # 45
Member
518 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

misskate18 :  Okay I am glad someone said it! I am quitting in January in order to clean myself out to stop my BC in March. And I am super worried about the mood swings, lack of appetite and sleep issues that will ensue! Any advice??

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