(Closed) 2 months left and I want to call it quits?!

posted 6 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Member
9640 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@kZs:   Here’s my take – you love him.  But you are not “in love” with him.  There is a huge difference!  If he doesn’t give you butterflies and you’re having these serious doubts it probably wouldn’t be a bad idea to share your feelings with him, be honest, and take some time for a break. 

You can see his good points and he’s a great friend.  (I’ve been there – you can’t manufacture passion, it doesn’t work).

You’ll be wise to follow your deepest intuition and gut instinct on this.  You deserve true happiness and the joys of being in love with the right man.  Quite possibly this man isn’t the right one for you. 

If you don’t let go of the wrong one you’ll never have room in your life for the right one to come.  Think about that.

Edit:  You said:  There have also been, over time, some issues that have been so hurtful I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to get past them. These are my reasons for wanting to end things.

This concerns me.  Do you want to share more of what he did that was so hurtful?  You have valid reasons for wanting to end things.

Trust youself on this.

Post # 4
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

After a wedding things dont suddenly ‘go back to normal.’ If there are issues before, there will be issues after.

You have to decide if you would rather deal with the fall out now, or later.

 

Post # 5
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee

I would have said you were probably scared of the move and being so settled, but you have repeatedly wanted to break up with this guy all thoughout your relationship.  And he talked you out of breaking up. 

Based on that, and SOLELY that, you should probably end it.  

Even when times are rough, i dont want to break up with my SO.  And he does give me butterflies, and he is super stable which is something i love about him, and moving in together was never an issue to cause me to question things. 

I think you have some soul searching to do. 

Post # 6
Member
5662 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I agree with @Rush1986:  that this has been something you have felt repeatedly, so it doesn’t sound to me like it’s fear of change. It sounds to me like you keep being convinced (or convincing yourself) to stay when you really aren’t sure you want to. I definitely would re think moving into this house, because if you feel stuck now you will feel 100% more stuck then. At least tell him you aren’t ready to move in immediately and see what happens when he gets back. But you really have to trust your gut and if your gut repeatedly tells you that this isn’t the guy for you, then there’s something to be said for that.

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