- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
So I’m in a little bit of a situation and would like to know some honest opinions, as I know people not related to the situation are going to give frank open opinions, and suggestions and I need it. Also I am sorry if its a little long..
I am having a DW in Mexico in November, but before then FI and I are getting legally married in the summer, on our actual anniversary, and it helps us bypass legal limitations in Mexico, blood work and translators and the like. It’s not a big thing, we are literally skipping a day of work, going to a JOP getting our papers signed and heading out. The big event will take place in November with Friends family, vows a ceremony a huge reception and all of that. The problem is we need to wittnesses for the signing, Our mothers have agreed, Mine is cool with the whole idea, skip work sign the papers then go grab dinner. my FMIL is NOT cool with the idea. She has stretched it out, asked to invite extra people to the signing and she keeps calling it a ceremony.
At first I let it slide, she’s excited she doesn’t have daughters, this is her only son getting married, I get it. Or at least I did, till Now, the weekend after the signing she wants to host a BBQ for people to come celebrate with us. Originally I had thought it was a good idea for that those guests that could not come to Mexico and close family, mothers fathers siblings that wouldn’t be at the signing would come, but MIL is now mentioning having aunts uncles, cousins and the like come down and celebrate with us, including all the people that will be at the DW. She says it doesn’t matter if they are coming to mexico or not they should still be invited…
Am I stupid for thinking this is a bad idea? I feel like by inviting all these people its like asking them to celebrate me twice, and like rubbing it in their faces that we’ll already be hitched by the time they come to the actual wedding – which I know could possibly offend some of the more traditional guests…
I think my issue is I feel Greedy doing something like this, Speically since these people have already placed deposits down on Mexico, I don’t want them to get an invite to a pre-party (I don’t even know what it would be called? An elopment party?) and be confused!
What do I do?
MIL emailed me, and every reply I try and type back comes off rude or selfish. I obviously need to speak to her in person but I have no idea how to word this where she will accept that it’s not a big deal, even if it is her baby boy getting married.