Post # 1
My fiance and I are considering using a Unitarian church for our ceremony. We went to see it a few weeks ago and it’s GORGEOUS and unique. There’s even a garden we can use to take pictures afterwards. The coordinator was super nice and helpful.
There are only 2 things concerning me:
1) The church is about 20-30 minutes from the reception hall (which is already booked). That time estimate is with no traffic. The church is in the Shadyside/city area of Pittsburgh, which can get pretty crazy with traffic even on weekends. The reception hall is in a suburban/rural/park area south of the city. There are no major roadways that lead directly there, and the road that DOES go there is undergoing major construction and probably will be for the next 100 years (thank you Penndot). Is that too much travel time/distance to ask my guests to endure?
2) Being a Unitarian church, they are very open to every walk of life, including gay marriage and civil union. They have a huge, beautiful rainbow banner hanging over their main entrance supporting gay marriage. My fiance and I are totally for it and think it’s awesome, but I do have several very conservative members of my family and I’m afraid of what their reaction would be.
I really don’t want their close-minded opinions to influence my decision, but I swear, my grandma would, like, faint if she saw it. lol. Typical 80 year old grandma.
And I have one uncle in particular who flaunts his conservative opinion like no other. I mean, I can understand that he has a different opinion/lifestyle, but I swear he gets off by bringing up political crap at family functions because he knows we’re so liberal. He gets this smug little smirk on his face and says something like, “so what do you think about these homo sickos wanting to get married?” or “do you believe in this global warming bs?” then giggles like a little kid. Ugh. Makes me sick. I just KNOW he’d have some smug comment about the church and its banner and I don’t feel like putting up with that on my wedding day!
What do you guys think about both?
Post # 3
@Stace126: As far as the distance goes, I would test drive it. Wait until saturday around the time you suspect the ceremony will be over, and drive the route the reception venue from the church. If its 30 minutes, its definately fine. If its closer to 45 minutes its pushing it, but it depends on your guests. I know I commute further than that on a regular basis so it wouldn’t bother me. I would definately pick a different church if it is an hour away.
As for the second item, I would discuss the flag with the church. I see no problem with you getting married there, because you can tell your uncle that you didn’t hang the flag and to get over it (obviously there are much stronger things you could say, but for the sake of the wedding I would avoid fist fights 😀 ). But, the church might be willing to let you remove the flag for the duration of the ceremony, and you can just cite it not matching your decor/theme. Unless its terribly difficult to hang, I don’t see them having a problem with it, and you certainly won’t lose anything for asking.
Post # 4
I hate to be a naysayer but I always get lost in Pittsburgh. I remember many hours of driving around, being able to see where I wanted to go, and not being able to find the road that went there. Even the GPS couldn’t figure it out. Anyway, definitely agree with the test drive!
Is the rainbow banner have a slogan referring to gay rights, or is it just a rainbow? Rainbows are in the bible anyway. Even if it wasn’t there, people will assume the same from it being a Unitarian church.
Post # 5
I’ve lived in Pittsburgh my entire life and there are many places in the city I won’t even drive in because it’s so confusing. My fiance and I were using the GPS to get to someplace we’d never been before and it literally had us going in circles because it thought we were on the “upper deck” of a bridge, but we were actually on the road below it. We were laughing so hard we couldn’t breathe. lol gotta love Pittsburgh!
As far as the banner goes, I actually really like it. It’s rainbow blocks and has a saying on it about civil rights or civil unions for all or something. I’m totally fine with it being there, but I’m just nervous about what certain family members will say. (and believe me, the fact that it’s my wedding day won’t make them keep their mouths shut).
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I don’t see that drive being an issue-I’ve been to weddings where it’s taken 45 minutes before. Is it ideal? No, but people can deal with it. 🙂 Also-you could have someone hand out directions from the ceremony to reception.
Re: the banner- I have a feeling if your uncle didn’t have this to complain about, he’d find something else political to tick you off anyway, plus you’re really not going to spend that much time talking to him on the wedding day. The church might not remove the banner, since that is such a strong principle for them. If you and Fiance love the church- go with it!