(Closed) 2 year engagement?!!

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My engagement lasted one day shy of four years and we dated for four years before getting engaged, so I know what you mean about waiting. It probably has nothing to do with his committment. Maybe he wants to wait until you are done with your degree and settled into your career. Planning a wedding while working on a Masters would probably drive most people up the wall with stress (I was working on my senior thesis and portfolio when I started planning and it drove me up the wall) so maybe a slightly extended engagement wouldn’t be a complete travesty. (Just a thought)

Post # 4
Member
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I know with my SO, getting engaged this year (5 years of dating) vs next year is a compromise. He didn’t want to get married before 2014 because he’s still in school (among other things) but I think one of the other things is that he has it in his head that he wants a really great honeymoon and needs to work on saving. He’s trying to pay off student loans at the same time, so it’s a little more difficult. While a 2 year engagement at this point in our relationship (we’d get married around 7 years together) seems really long, I’d rather be engaged and have that time to plan and enjoy it.

Post # 6
Member
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@WhatMaeBee:  Should or want? I’ve discussed timelines with my SO re: kids and other things, so you should definitely talk that if it’s important that you have children by a certain age.

Post # 7
Hostess
16215 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Our engagement was 2 years and 4 months long, and we loved every second of it! But it also made sense for our age and circumstances.

Post # 9
Member
2402 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

By the time we get married, we’ll have been engaged for over 2 1/2 years, and together for 7 years. For us, it made sense to wait because I wanted to finish nursing school first (when he proposed I hadn’t found out whether I got into the program yet).

Honestly, it may seem like the wait will be forever, but it will go by fast! Now I’m less than 7 months away from our wedding day!

Post # 11
Member
2815 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Fiance and I will have been engaged for 2 1/2 years when we get married and I’m in my 30s.  It is what it is.  Take the time and try to actually enjoy planning instead of stressing about it and school together.

Post # 12
Member
2759 posts
Sugar bee

I know it seems long, but it really is nice to have the extra planning time. You can easily fill those 2 years with going to bridal shows (omg so much free cake!), putting together pinboards, trying on dresses and putting together logistics. You’ll almost definitely get your pick for venues/vendors if you are booking super early, which is a plus – 2013 spots are filling up right now, so you might find yourself making concessions.

And since you’re going to be involved in an intense degree program, it might make more logistical sense. Wedding planning takes a lot of time and energy, which really should be devoted to your degree at this point. In a year, I’d say that’s a bit of a crunch – but spread out over 2 years, you’ll certainly have enough time to plan and balance your courseload.

Our engagement will be a little under 2.5 years, and I think it’s for the best. But I do understand the impatience – I get like that, too!!

Post # 14
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My SO and I are coming up to our 7 year dating anniversary. We looked at rings but he told me not to get excited for a year or so. So when we have been together for almost 8 years we’d get engaged. At this point I would love a 2 year engagement! I actually like the idea of a longer engagement. Ideal to me is around 2 years.

Post # 15
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Maybe he is worried about the stress of planning and you going for your masters?  It’s hard enough doing one but doing both at the same time could be too much!

Our engagement was 3 years because we wanted to wait until we were done with school.

Post # 16
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Our engagement will be 2 years and 3 months (assuming we book the month we think were going to book int), and I definately understand the feeling of waiting while engaged. Its 8 months in and I feel like we can’t decide on a lot of the things I’m ready to decide on because it is too early too book. And you can’t pick certain things until those items are booked. So I’m not sure what the advantage is to a 2 year engagement vs a 1 year engagement. Our visits to places are spread out though because we are getting married out of state and it would be more difficult to plan visits with a shorter engagement.

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