(Closed) $25 to a very expensive store — and I still can't afford anything

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Hostess
3369 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Instead of doing something behind her back, I would go ahead and talk to her directly about it. Be upfront and honest! That’s the best thing that you can do. 

Just tell her that it was incredibly sweet of her, but you cannot use it because you can’t afford to buy anything even with the gift card. Maybe tell her that you will hang on to it and use it at a later date when you are able to afford something extra? I’m sure she’ll understand hon, times are tough. Just don’t lie to her or do something without telling her, that’s the worst thing that you can do. 

Post # 4
Member
6512 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@PacificMrs:  I completely agree!  I don’t think she will be hurt if you thank her sincerely and tell her why you can’t use it right now, but I do think that she’d be sad if you didn’t and she later found out. 

Post # 6
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Girl, sell it on eBay! My darling little brother got me a $50 gift card to a store that was more suited for clubbing girls…or 12 year olds with bad parents. I got $48 for it on eBay! Then just go buy something with the money you get from an affordable place and show her that (if she insists).

Post # 7
Hostess
3369 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m sure she would appreciate your honesty much more than you doing something behind her back like selling it on Ebay. When she asks what you used it on because she thinks that you used it, what are you going to tell her? Just be honest. She will understand if she is your friend honey. 

Post # 8
Member
10567 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

Find out if you can transfer it to someone else, and if so see if you can sell it to someone (I think there are websites where you can do this).  If she’s the type of friend who is understanding, use the money for lingerie at an affordable store and you can show her what you bought.

Post # 9
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Seconding the ebay thing! Or craigslist!

You might only get $20ish dollars for it, but $20 in cash is much more useful than $25 locked up in a card you can’t really afford to use.

Post # 10
Member
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

You couldn’t eve buy ONE pair of underwear?

If literally the only thing under $25 in the store is the wash, I’d buy it.  Tell her you’ve heard rave reviews about it and can’t wait to use it.  Or that you’ve already used it and it’s wonderful.

The LAST thing I would do is tell her you can’t use the card because it wasn’t enough.  I can’t even think of anything that could make her feel worse.

Either that or buy something inexpensive somewhere else and cut the tags off before you show her – your call!

Post # 11
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

id buy the wash, tell her thats the most important lingerie..as its on your skin all day and without a good smell you might as well be a naked stinky bride 🙂

if you arent too concerned about any other lingerie- i wouldnt worry, you can find TONS Of new things on ebay ,i got all my bridesmaids Vickies panties for half what they sell for in the stores!

Post # 12
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

 I (obviously) agree with @Juliepants:. Even if my MOH gave me a $10 gift card to La Perla, I wouldn’t call her up and say “Hey, I love you, and appreciate the gift, but $10 isn’t enough to buy anything”. What’s my Maid/Matron of Honor supposed to say? “oh, sorry, here’s $100”? Nope, she’d just feel bad. Maybe $25 is all your friend could afford. I’d buy the wash or  some pasties (if it’s the type of store to sell those…those can’t be expensive) or sell the GC.

Post # 13
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I would absolutely NOT tell her that you couldn’t use the gift certificate because it wasn’t enough. That’s so incredibly rude. She gave you a gift so you should just be thankful for it. You said she’s from Out of Town so she probably had no idea how much the stuff actually cost. 

If it were me, I’d just hold onto the GC until you can afford to use it. It’s only $25 so even if that’s a year down the road or never, it’s really not that big of a deal. If you absolutely have to get some kind of lingerie to show her (which I find very strange but whatev), then go to Macys and get something from the sale rack. I doubt the girls going to inspect the tags.

Post # 14
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I don’t think the gift was rude. I personally dislike gift cards but she could have bought you something you don’t like from somewhere else for $25 and you’d still be stuck with nothing useful. Gifts aren’t always useful so its best to focus on the symbolic meaning. I like the idea of buying the lingerie wash and agree with the posters who suggest you should not tell her you cannot use it because the store is too expensive.

Post # 15
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

She most likely had no idea how expensive that store could be. I agree with PP and say you don’t say anything to her. It would definitely make me feel bad if I were in her shoes. If she asks just either say you haven’t gotten around to using it, or lie and said you bought ___ with it.

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