29 and single

posted 2 years ago in 30 Something
Post # 2
Member
9926 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Go out and pursue hobbies you enjoy. That’s the best way to meet people!

Post # 3
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

happycomelately :  I found my soon to be fiancé on Match.com. It doesn’t work for everyone (and I had to go on a lot of bad dates) but it worked out.

Post # 4
Member
953 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I also met my husband on Match. I think it’s becoming the new normal these days. I don’t drink and I work with primarily women, so my options were limited in meeting someone new in person.

Post # 5
Member
8856 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

happycomelately :  I love your username! How long will you be in school? Any chance of making friends (and maybe more) with someone there? Or are there any clubs or activities you could join to meet people?

Post # 6
Member
4540 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

happycomelately :  make a profile on a dating site. By dating site, I mean an old fashioned one and not a swipe left/right site. 😁

I met my hubby over ten years ago on a dating site. I know at least four couples who met on the same site in the same year as we did. We are all happily married. 

I’d also put the word out with friends/family that you are looking for something serious. They may know someone perfect for you who is looking for the same thing. Never be afraid to be single but never be afraid to out yourself out there and to be honest in what you are seeking. I also will say that give people a chance even when you think they don’t meet your criteria for a mate at first glance. My husband had a few things that didn’t meet my ‘list’ but his first emails intrigued me enough to want to go on a date. Ironically the few things in my list didn’t matter long term because we actually share similar backgrounds and are core values are perfectly matched. If I’d ruled him out because of a stupid list, I’d be a lot poorer for not having such an amazing guy in my life.

Good luck xx

Post # 8
Member
9718 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

All my single friends are on Match or Eharmony. Several people I know have met thier spouse through a dating site.

Post # 10
Member
872 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2019

I met my fiance on Okcupid.  Honestly online dating was pretty much mediocre or awful until I met him.  I just had to keep at it.

Post # 11
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee

I will go against the grain and say screw online dating.

Literally the worst. Ever. The whole concept of it just blows, you’re crafting the Perfect image of yourself (probably even to the point of lying) just to make yourself marketable, all while judging each other based on looks.

You have a busy schedule, so honestly making time for yourself and picking up a hobby will be your best bet.

1. You’ll do something you enjoy and 2. You won’t waste your time with painstaking convos just to meet the person and be like “Meh” and 3. By picking up a hobby in real life You’ll meet new people, make new friends and fall in love with genuine people. (not some crafted image) 

Good luck!  

Post # 12
Member
2517 posts
Sugar bee

I know you say you have no time to meet people – but I can guarantee that you DO have time for what you prioritize. You also say you want a husband and kids, and those things will be time consuming, too. If you can make time for maintaining a relationship with a husband, then you can make time for dates that might lead you to that husband. 

I met my fiance on an app – while a full-time grad student. 🙂 I tried plenty of online dating platforms and I really had to put myself out there and make dating a personal assignment for myself — I went on at least one date a week for months and months. I met tons of duds, and I went on dates with all kinds of people. I highly recommend Amy Webb’s TED talk about online dating – it helped me be strategic, though I admit my critera was less stringent than hers!: 

https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_webb_how_i_hacked_online_dating

My strategy was that I would go on a date with anyone who 1) didn’t raise any red flags (no shirtless pix, corny pickup lines, etc), 2) sounded somewhat interesting/had something in their profile that I liked 3) was someone I thought I could be attracted to, and 4) valued education/learning. I felt that talking to people for long periods of time without meeting was a waste of time because sometimes I’d have weeks-long convos and then we’d meet and have no chemistry in person. 

Post # 14
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I’m not big on dating sites. I tried a few in my 20’s, but I just got too embarassed to meet anyone. I guess that’s just my personality. Anyone of interest that I’ve ever met has been just going through everyday life. Example: work, friends of friends, and church. Also, as PP mentioned, if you have hobbies (or the time for them!) try going places where there will be other people participating in whatever it is you enjoy. If you’re an outdoorsy person, find some group outdoor activities. I know this is FAR easier said than done. Especially when you’re working, going through school, and feel too busy to even get a full night’s sleep. If you don’t want to wait until you are less busy, you will just have to purposely carve out time in your schedule to go out and do something. Even if it’s just once a week. Try to make some connections when you are able to do that. Once again, I know it’s not easy, but the only way to get over the hump is to put yourself out there. 

Post # 15
Hostess
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Just want to add there’s nothing wrong with being 29 and single. 

Someone will come along. Life doesn’t work by your timeline. Relax and do you, things will happen. You can’t force things like this to happen. That being said are you hanging around mostly married and engaged friends? That may have something to do with it. 

Have you tried asking a friend to set you up with someone?

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