(Closed) 2nd engagement ring?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 2
Member
493 posts
Helper bee

I am surprised that you didn’t return the ring. Most women do. The law is on the side of the future groom. He didn’t want it back, even if you paid for it?

Post # 3
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

My friend did this. Used her diamond from an old engagement ring in a new setting with a new guy. I thought it was extremely tacky. Idk I would sell it and use it to buy something new. 

Post # 5
Member
2748 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

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merrymargaret :  I think that only applies to engaged couples, OP said she was married to her ex.

View original reply
wildxalaska :  I don’t think you have to worry about a new ring competing with your previous engagement ring, it’s possible you’ll be the only one who will even remember what your old ring looks like by the time you are engaged again so it really only matters what you would be happy with. 

Post # 6
Member
9002 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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wildxalaska :  I’m practical. I don’t see anything wrong with it. I’m also skeptical that “most women” return their engagement rings after a divorce. 

Post # 7
Member
970 posts
Busy bee

I think you should keep the one you loved, otherwise nothing will measure up and you’ll always feel disappointed. Maybe ask for something completely different as an “engagement present”- a necklace or a gemstone RHR. No one will notice/care that it’s the same except the two of you, so it’s really only his feelings about it that matter.

Post # 8
Member
1159 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Fremont, CA

I think you would do better if you focused more on the quality aspect of your relationship than on the size and look of your next ring. Clearly a dream ring doesn’t guarantee a dream marriage, as you well found out yourself.

Post # 9
Member
2983 posts
Sugar bee

I had the same issue!!! I am extremely picky when it comes to wearing something for the rest of my life. So I had searched high and low for just the right ring!!! So when it came time for a second one, it was a tough time finding one I loved like the other. It didn’t have to beat the other, but I also didn’t want to settle on something that just worked. 

Long story short, I found one I loved. BUT, I came back down to reality & realized that it’s dumb to pay thousands of dollars for an overpriced diamond. (No offense to anyone, that’s just my own personal opinion ). And all I really wanted was to be with my man. Who is everything I’m looking for. And nothing like my ex. So I ended up finding an $80 CZ ring that I love. Because I’d rather use that money on a great honeymoon, or buying a house together.

Moral of the story is that it’s a journey that is unique to everyone. As for the old stone, that would definitely save money. But make sure it’s ok with your new man, first.

Post # 13
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2018 - Omaha, NE

I think this is going to depend on what your eventual next fiance thinks about the subject. I know plenty of guys who would be jazzed to not have to spend a ton if you already have a stone you want to use. 

Otherwise, the plain fact is that your taste may change by the next time you get engaged, so it may end up being a moot point anyways if you end up liking something different. 

If it were me I would reset the stone/s from your original e-ring and have your fiance get something new when the time comes. That way it will be unique and special to that relationship.

For the record, I was engaged previously (in high school, but still) and my tastes changed drastically. My ering now (emerald cut halo in rose gold) is very different than my ering from my first engagement (heart shape bezel in yellow). Even if ends up being the same style for you, it will be different because it’s new! I don’t believe in taboo about things like this, as long as you and your Fiance are on the same page, who cares?

Post # 14
Member
1159 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Fremont, CA

View original reply
wildxalaska :  oh, I didn’t mean to be snarky! Sorry if I sounded like it. I find it very hard to convey tone, as English is not my first language.

What I meant is that a ring is nothing but a symbol of commitment, and its size shouldn’t be one’s concern, especially after they found a happy, fulfilling relationship, which is more precious than any ring. 🙂

I apologize for sounding mean.

I truly hope you and your future fiancé find the perfect solution.

Post # 15
Member
2326 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I have no problem with it but I agree that it’s largely dependent on what your future Fiance is comfortable with. otherwise damn nice RHR 

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