Post # 1
Okay so I am in a sticky situation . . . when I got engaged I asked my two best friends to be my maid and matron of honor and my sister to just be a bridesmaid. My reasoning was that my sister is 13 years older than me and I just didn’t think that she would be into the whole planning process. So now, my sister has really stepped up. She has decided to pay for our entire honeymoon, planned and catered my entire bridal shower, and overall just has been there big time. We have never been so close until now. So now what do I do? I cannot ask either of the other girls to step down, so I was thinking just add my sister as another Matron of Honor? ANY suggestions would be great as this is really stressing me out 🙂
Post # 3
Honestly, I doubt that your sister cares about what she is called, especially if she is older! She loves you and is doing this because she loves you, not because of her wedding title. You can always just list all three of your attendants as “bridal attendants”, or you can totally call her a matron of honor…but again, I’m willing to bet that as long as you give her a heartfelt thanks and work on nurturing your relationship after the wedding, she won’t even NOTICE her title. I’m technically having two matron of honors and one brother of honor, but I’m just calling them my bridal party and being done with it.
Post # 4
i agree with pp. i doubt she cares what she’s called, as long as you show your appreciation for her in a meaningful way.
Post # 5
Unless she specifically mentions or asks why she’s not a maid/matron, then I think you’re okay.I’d just find a special way to thank her for all she’s done.
However, from my experience, I have very sensitive sisters, and one is my maid of honor, one is my matron of honor, because if I ever chose between them or didn’t give one the title, I think they’d kill me.
Post # 6
Thanks guys for the help, I did forget to mention she has been “joking” about why she is going to have to stand third in line at the alter, and how my bf is my maid of honor. Just little comments here and there but I can tell she is only half kidding ya know . . .
Post # 7
@tetorger: Just remember there’s always a little truth behind every ‘just kidding’…
Post # 8
Maybe don’t call it out in the program. Just have 3 bridesmaids and 3 groomsmen? That way you lessen the importance of the title.
Post # 9
I don’t think it can hurt. I mean, I think that flows nicely in the program:
- Maid of Honor
- Matron of Honor
- Matron of Honor
I don’t really care for the term bridesmaid especially if they are older and/or married. I would change the title but not make a big deal of it.
Or, you could forego titles all together and just have them as their relationship to you:
- Sister of the Bride
- Friend of the bride
- Friend of the Bride
Post # 10
I think you should leave it the way it is. Obviously she is doing all of this out of love not out of the fact she is wanting her title to be bumped up. Leave it as it is.