(Closed) 3 month's salary on a ring, reasonable or not?

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 32
6109 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

The DeBeers marketing team was so good that it convinced people that 1) engagement rings had to be diamond, and b) it should cost 2 months salary!



H had a grad friend who demanded a $14k ring from her hubby.  She wasn’t in love with him and she married him anyway (she didn’t think love was for everyone); maybe the ring was like buying her out.  But it required a ring valued at $14k or more.

Post # 33
2424 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Completely unreasonable to me. I’d rather invest the money or put it into retirement funds, etc. I love my ring to pieces and doubt I will ever “upgrade” and it was much less than 3 months pay.

Post # 34
1367 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Here’s another perspective: what if you have no salary, or essentially, a negative salary – by which I mean student debt. Enagagements are not just for people with well-paying jobs! 🙂 If Fiance and I went by salary, that would make no sense at all, because as grad students we get more in debt by the month. Does that mean it’s irresponsible to spend money on a ring? Well, by our standards it was desirable, but then we spent less than $100.

Post # 35
3616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I don’t agree that there should be a “rule” everyone follows. Everyone’s finances are different. I think the couple should spend whatever amount they are comfortable with. And the rest of the world should butt out.

Post # 36
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

If my H had tried to spend $35K on a ring????  I would have questioned his sanity.

Post # 37
652 posts
Busy bee

You know, 3 month salary rule is because people in the industry want to make more money off from you lol 

Post # 38
10449 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

Three months salary would have been a car! Not comfortable wearing that on my hand! And I also think it’s kind of wasteful personally, I can think of many other things I’d rather have than a $30k ring. 

ETA: This is just three months of his salary right? Three months combined would be… wow.

Post # 39
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

It depends on how much your salary is, I suppose.

My Fiance spent just about 3 months’ salary on my ring, but you know how much my ring cost? A whole $3k.

He worked full-time three summers in a row (we are students) as a mover, painter, for a GIS firm, etc, so that he’d have enough to pay for the ring and still be able to cover expenses.

Now, if he was netting 12k a month? Lol no, I definitely wouldn’t have even known what to do with a $36k ring.

Post # 40
2211 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
@phillybride61513:  +1

Outdated and too extravagant.

Good marketing on the part of jewelry companies, though..to make a whole (or at least half 😉 population think folks should drop 3 months salary on an engagement ring.

Post # 41
4302 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If he has the money and that’s what he wants to spend it on, it’s his choice.

Post # 42
8031 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Lalaine:  I think it really depends. I don’t think it should be a hard and fast rule.

It’s tricky really. Like if you make $400/month sooo $1,200 for a ring, I think that’s really inexpensive for a ring. But then again… if you’re only making $400/month how could you ever afford that $1,200 ring?

On the flipside, if you make a really good income, spending $30K, $40K, $50K+ on a ring could be a bit ridiculous as well.

I think that the couple needs to be comfortable with the budget, and the budget needs to be based on life priorities as well. I could have that $30K ring, but then I wouldn’t get vacations for a year. We’ll be spending less than 3 months’ income… but it will still end up costing a lot more than the average ring because my SO makes good money. And is it gross or net salary? If it’s gross salary then that’s a stratospheric ring cost… in our case anyway… we have pretty high taxes where I live!

Post # 43
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Before or after tax? Wink

Lets see Fiance spent about just under 1.5 months salary (before tax) on mine. He had plenty in the bank but I don’t hold it against me. If he’d spent 2-3 months salary, I’d have a carat or more. To be honest, at 25 in Northeast Ohio…I’d look like a real goober prancing around with that on my hand. I’m much more interested in us buying a house with that savings!

Post # 44
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

My fiance spent about three months salary on my ring but only because he was making a marginal amount so three months amounted to about $4500. Since I was the main breadwinner at the time, we was able to swing that without a problem.

Post # 45
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I came from a culture that does not have the three month or 2 month salary crap. But I believe the ring represents the promise being together forever, that he will take care of me, protect me forever. There is nothing wrong with wearing an expensive ring. It just shows that I have a husband that is able to take care of me financially. Different people think differently. My Fiance has cash, then why not. He paid 4x of his monthly salary on my ring

Post # 46
2778 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

Someone told my DH about that “rule” before we got engaged and he nearly swallowed his tongue. lol. My original ering was very inexpensive ($350) but we were broke students, so that still seemed expensive. I don’t remember how much he made back then, but I seem to remember peanuts…ha ha

I have had a parade of rings since we got married, the one I have now was about half a week of DH’s salary..so..yeah that is a rule we don’t follow.. I don’t think it matters what someone spends, as long as you are comfortable living without that money, it’s all good. I also think it’s totally insane to “demand” that the ring cost at least X amount.

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