(Closed) 3 month's salary on a ring, reasonable or not?

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 47
Member
731 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Im against it. Im not a materialistic person, i know some people are but some people are, I get that. Personal prefferances and all that jazz. my rings was under a grand and i couldnt be happier, if he used the 3 month rule it would have been an $8000 ring. way too big in my oppinion and rediculus to spend that much.. we would rather put it towards a house

Post # 48
Member
15528 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Sure, if you have a fat savings account and low living expenses where it’s easy to save, I don’t think it’s too unreasonable.  It was definitely too much for us to spend, he spent about 1.5 months salary and it barely put a dent in our savings so we could have easily spent 3 months.  But that was just the number was what we were comfortable with, not because of how many months salary it was.

Post # 49
Member
8434 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

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@Scar_cats_tic:  +1, gotta applaud DeBeer’s marketing team though.

Post # 50
Member
1359 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think it’s too much. 

For someone making $24k a year that is $6000 dollars. 

For someone making $36k a year that is $9000 dollars.

For someone making $48k a year that is $12000 dollars. 

For someone making $60000 a year that is $15000 dollars.

Most of my peers are in this salaray range since we are all young and graduated from college within the past few years. I can’t imagine anyone having that kind of money to spend. 

I personally spend about a third of one month’s salary and I’m quite happy with it. 

Post # 51
Member
1879 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

IMO that is waaaaaaaaay too much. My ring was less than one month’s salary. I think that’s pretty fair, because it’s still likely something that needs to be saved up for (or pulled out of a healthy savings account). I definitely would not feel comfortable if my fiance had to really financially struggle or risk his regular/retirement savings or emergency fund to pay for what is, in the end, a luxury good. Especially since gorgeous rings are available at every price point.

Interestingly enough, APPARENTLY this is one reason why the jewelry industry perpetuates the idea that the woman shouldn’t be involved in picking the ring – women usually set significantly lower budgets than men do on their own. So if the man is picking on his own and trying to impress her, he spends a lot more. I know my fiance was planning on spending around two months’ salary and was SHOCKED when all the rings I showed him when he asked for ideas were much less than that. He had really bought into a lot of the engagement ring BS.

Post # 52
Member
322 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I had never even heard of this “rule” until I joined the bee. It’s ridiculous. Absolutely stupid and ridiculous. Buy what you like that you can afford and be done with it. The idea that some girls not only condone but expect this blows my mind. No man should have to squirrel away 3 months salary for a ring. If my fiance had spent 6k on a ring, I’d be so upset. That could go towards paying for our venue and food for the wedding. My ring was $850 from a local jewler (custom made) and I couldn’t be happier for what I got for the money.

Post # 53
Member
1508 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

3 months salary would have given me a ring worth over $16k which is crazy!

We spent less then a months salary on my ring and I think it’s perfect!

Post # 54
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Holy crap. 3 months salary for my Fiance would be a 30k ring. I can’t even. No way. Fiance only used 1 months.

Post # 55
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@jennyinstereo:  I see things as opposite way though. I would rather spend $ on a ring than a wedding. It’s not like I do not want a wedding, but if I have to cut wedding cost to put into a ring I would. 10/10 of the people I ask about their wedding, they barely remember how it went, or how to food tasted like that day since they were too busy running around. Why spend the money feeding people instead of buying a nice ring or a car? Just a thought.

Post # 56
Member
8679 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think there are numerous articles that say this is no longer the case. Most people I know in my area and age range make $50-110k anD I think I only know one person whose ring was over $15,000

Post # 57
Member
529 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012 - Hacienda los Agaves

I pinned that one a while ago.

My husband said the same thing a while before we got engaged, but I guess you could say we live under different rules since engagement rings are not the rule around here, and diamonds rings are very unusual, so even if you get an engagement ring you can get one on the cheap and not a lot of people will care.

 

I remember a TV show when someone mentioned it to a guy and he said: “Three month’s salary, maybe on a flat screen, never a ring!” Guys have different priorities.

Post # 58
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

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@KCKnd2: I always look forward to your responses. They are always well-thought out and they put things in perspective.

Post # 59
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

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@deetroitwhat:  +1 

As long as he can afford it. If not don’t even dare ask…

Post # 60
Member
3694 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

This, is why I don’t tell anyone 1) what I make 2) what my husband makes or 3) what my ring costs. 

It’s a really nice ring, it cost a lot of money, it’s none of your business.  I certainly didn’t demand he spend any amount of money on it.  HE chose how much HE was comfortable spending and we picked it out together. 

ETA: It’s also none of anyone’s business, but, we have no debt save our mortgage, have savings for way more than 6 months salary, and have healthy retirement accounts.  We don’t have huge high paying jobs, we just put priority on saving for what we deem important expenditures.  For him – an engagement ring.

Post # 61
Member
652 posts
Busy bee

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@housebee:  and to those who fell for the scheme 😉 but like what others say, as long your SO can’t afford and you are in good shape, why not?

For us, it was too much money. Plus I don’t like big rings for the fact that you are attracting unwanted attention, but that’s just me 🙂 

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