Ah yes, some bees always go off on how you’re too young for marriage under the age of 25. It can be quite frustrating to not have your feelings or relationship taken seriously because of age, especially when you know that if you were 27 and expressing the same timeline concerns, they would react quite differently.
As a psychology minor, it’s more and more evident that the brain changes throughout life. Growth and change doesn’t just stop at 25. 40 year olds can confirm they weren’t the same person they were at 35, as can 70 years olds who used to be 65. Change is a part of life, regardless of the age factor, and getting married at 30 doesn’t guarantee a happy marriage without divorce.
Some of us know what we want when we are young, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Don’t let people push you around with judgement just because they think your boyfriend may want to “sow his wild oats” some more. Does that happen sometimes? Yes, but it is applied more as a stereotype of young men than anything else. Frankly, I think it’s a disservice to them. Assuming they won’t stay faithful, or setting the expectation they need to sleep around before finding “the one”, makes them feel they must do it in order to live their life “right”. My husband has only ever been with me, and has no desire to play the field because he already has what he wants. It doesn’t make him any less of a man, just like how his age doesn’t dictate how faithful he will be.
OP, I’m glad that you’re going to have another talk on Monday. Hopefully you can compromise on a timeline together and set goals for the future. You deserve to know that the relationship is heading where you want it to, and that you’re not wasting your time.
Heck, I started timeline talks at the age of 17, two months into dating my then boyfriend. It was less of a “when do you want to marry me” and more of a “when do you see yourself getting married (in general), do you want kids, if so how many” type conversation to be sure that we had compatible future visions for our lives. We did, and had many more time line talks from then on. Many of which ended up moving upward due to extraneous circumstances, we got engaged and legally married at 21, are having a big wedding at 23, and plan to have our first child around 28 (after 11 years together!).
We still have timeline talks every month or so about big goals in life, such as when to start looking at buying our first house, and when to start TTC. Many of those things are still far off, but it keeps us on the same page, and as the planner I am, keeps me content and secure with our future.
I wish you the best OP and look forward to your update on Monday!