(Closed) 30s Mommas

posted 8 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 33
Member
1648 posts
Bumble bee

@OfficeBride:  Thatnks for starting this thread! I won’t be getting married until June and by that time I’ll be a few weeks away from turning 26.

I don’t even want to think about children until I’m right around the age of 30. This gives some good insight and advice!

 

Post # 34
Member
2492 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

@OfficeBride:  

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30?
Yes, but only from myself! Well, my dad started asking me when i was going to have a baby earlier this year.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?
I hadn’t met the right person! I am having an oopsie baby with my on and off SO.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?


Well, right now I’m 7mos preg and going about life as normal. It will be tough when baby gets here- I wish I could work part time.

What do you and your partner do for a living? I work in marketing for a large university health system. He is a financial analyst.

 

Post # 35
Member
3910 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit  30?

Nope, I didnt feel pressure but I did feel worry because I have and had some health related issues, so I thought it would take us longer to conceive, which it did.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I dont think I waited until my 30s because I wanted, but more because I had to, since I wasnt ready financially to bring a child into my household and besides DH and I wanted to enjoy some “us” time first.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

So far since I am still pregnant, I havent had to change anything in my life, but I am sure once the baby is here I will be working twice a week from home and DH is planning to work at least once a week from home.

What do you and your partner do for a living?

I am a Paralegal and Court Interpreter and DH is an Engineer. 

Post # 36
Member
783 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

So I’m a bit of a different story in that I am in my 30’s, I’m 32 and DH is 30, but I already have a 12 yo child from a previous relationship.  Do the math, yep I was 20.  Baby #2 is due in April.  

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30?

We didn’t even get married until after I turned 30.  Most of the pressure has come within the past year from both sides of the family.  And a bit on ourselves too.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

We dated for 4 years before being engaged for 10 months, and we’ve been married about a year and a half.  We wanted to take the first couple years and adjust to life as a new family and most importantly, give DD12 the time to adjust to having a dad around all the time which was something new.  We also wanted to buy a house and take our daughter Disney first, which sounds silly but I’ve always wanted to take her.  Now that we have, we’re ready and baby is coming in April.  

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

Working together!!  Luckily I work very close to home and am able to get home much ealier than DH is so that DD can get her homework done and I can get her off to sports practices and other events.  A lot of times we switch off on things like cooking dinner and other household chores while the other is working with DD on something.  We’re hoping that I can be a Stay-At-Home Mom once the baby comes – we’d like to have 2 more for a total of 3.  That will help considerably.  It’s really really really tough being a full time working mom with a 12 year old let alone an infant.  I don’t know how I could get everything done as a working mom to a little one.  It’s bee tough enough with DD.  

What do you and your partner do for a living?

I’m an accountant and DH is a trader.  

Post # 37
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m 35 and he’s 43.

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit  30?

Not really. I did feel a bit of pressure when I turned 34/35, once I was fixed in my relationship and people started talking about fertility rates.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I wasn’t with anyone that I wanted to reproduce with. I did a university degree followed by a master’s degree and worked abroad. I honestly didn’t put it off but the circumstances haven’t aligned until now.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

Still early days since I’m due next month! Fingers crossed that I do. My husband and I are uber-busy now pre-baby.

What do you and your partner do for a living?

He is self-employed (artistic field) and I work for (Canadian) government in the cultural sector.

Post # 38
Member
208 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m 33 and he’s 29.

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit   30?

Just the pressure I put on myself. I know I want more than one and I wanted to get started before I turn 35 (I turn 33 next week) and didn’t want to be having kids while in my 40’s.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I didn’t necessarily “wait” until my 30’s. I didn’t meet DH until I was 28 and there wasn’t anyone before him that I saw starting a family with. It was important to DH that we be married before we start having kids.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

I think we have it now. But we aren’t expecting and just starting trying. I’ll let you know when we finally have some little ones.

What do you and your partner do for a living?

He is a lineman for the power company and I work as an admin assistant in a real estate office.

 

Post # 39
Member
2402 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Great idea! I often feel old around these parts!

 

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30?

I did. All my friends were starting to get married and have kids at this point. All the pressure came from me though. However, I hadn’t even met DH at that point so there was nothing I could do! 

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I only met him at 31. We are TTC at the moment and are starting to stress 8 months in. If we had met earlier we would have tried much sooner but there’s nothing we can do about that now! 

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

Not sure! That will be an interesting one! I’m a bit of a control freak so it may be hard letting some things go.

What do you and your partner do for a living?

I’m a teacher and DH is a bank manager.

 

 

 

Post # 40
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@phoebephoebo:  Don’t stress! It took us almost a year and when we decided to just take a break from actually trying and not worry about it until after summer….BAM! 🙂 If you haven’t already, I would definitely recommend temping! Good luck 🙂

Post # 41
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30?

I get soem pressure from my sister but she said its because I am such a good aunt to her kids she can’t wait to return the favor!  I think most of teh rpessure comes from myself.  I’ve alwasy wanted kids, I grew up around them and can’t wait to have them.  I will be 36 when we marry next April so I’m itching definteiyl to get going.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I dated a bunch of jerks/losers so none of them ever seemed to be the right partner or baby daddy for me.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

I’m 35, I think it just came with life experiences and making wise choices.

What do you and your partner do for a living?

He is a thriving rael estate agent, I am an IT Auditor.

Post # 42
Member
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’m 37, due with my first in January.

 

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30? Nope. I wasn’t in a relationship with anyone, and was actually on the fence about having kids at all. I figured it’d happen if it was meant to happen, if I met the right person, but I was also okay with it never happening. (My only regret would have been to not know what it felt like to be pregnant or someone’s mom, but I was willing to live with that if it didn’t work out for me.) My family never asked, never insinuated much.

 

Why did you “wait” until your 30s? I didn’t meet my husband until I was 34, and we got married last year when i was 36. Started working right away on making a baby, since I fully expected it to take us a while. We got it all worked out on our third cycle trying, thankfully!

 

How have you found and managed balance in your life? Like some others, I think being in my late 30s just gives me automatic perspective that helps me balance everything. I’ve been through enough, I have good experiences to base my future paths on.  Specifically RE: baby stuff, they say that if you want something done, give it to a busy person!

 

What do you and your partner do for a living? I’m a manager in a technical publishing/editorial group, and my husband is a retail store manager.

 

 

 

Post # 43
Member
737 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@glimmeringone:  Thanks for posting! I will most likely be 36 when we TTC, so it makes me feel better to hear that it’s worked well for you.

Post # 44
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30? No pressure from anyone other than myself.  I’ve always know I’d like to have more than 1 child, ideally 3, so I knew that if I wanted this to happen that I couldn’t wait too long.  Plus I know a number of people who had problems conceiving so I figured it wasn’t in my best interest to wait too long.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s? Life doesn’t always turn out how you planned.. I was previously married and always figured I’d wait until my late 20’s to start trying for kids.  Unfortunately when I was in my late 20’s the marriage fell apart.  I came to terms with the fact perhaps I wouldn’t end up having children, or would adopt, but that these were better options than staying with the wrong partner.  Thankfully I did end up meeting a wonderful man who I married this past January and we are expecting our first this November.  A long-winded way of saying that although I never thought I’d wait until my 30’s, it was life’s plan for me and I couldn’t be happier.

How have you found and managed balance in your life? After finishing university I worked insane hours to get my career going.  I realized that I had a successful career but was miserable in so many other aspects of my life.  I changed jobs and that led me to reflect a lot on my first marriage which ended shortly thereafter.  I think going through these hardships gave me some real perspective on what’s important in life and has helped me find balance in my life.

What do you and your partner do for a living? I am a chartered accountant (equivalent of CPA in the US) and my husband works in finance.

Post # 45
Member
1690 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30?

I got some pressure from my brother’s girlfriend but not really from anyone else until recently. His mother keeps telling him it’s time for some more grandchildren.

 

Why did you “wait” until your 30s?

I was 29 when I met my husband and we just got married 4 months ago. I didn’t feel the need to start a family with anyone I was previously with. We just started trying at the beginning of September, I’m hopeful that it happened this month.

How have you found and managed balance in your life?

We’re not sure if we’re expecting yet, so we’ll see!

 

What do you and your partner do for a living?

He remodels houses and I’m a photographer.

Post # 46
Member
1074 posts
Bumble bee

I’m 30, DH is 29.

Did you feel any pressure to start a family once you hit 30? Not really. SIL makes comments every so often, and I think my dad is getting antsy for more grandkids. The rest of the pressure is all self-inflicted. A lot of that is due to the sheer quantity of babies being born all around me.

Why did you “wait” until your 30s? It’s just how it worked out for us. I’ll be 31 when we start TTC this spring. We decided when I was 26 that we would start no later than 31 and we’d work out the rest of the details as best we could. DH has been in school for the past 5.5 years (urgh) and neither of us wanted to start a family until he was better set professionally.

How have you found and managed balance in your life? We have a pretty good work-life balance already. I think it may be a bit tighter after he graduates but I think by and large things will fit together nicely. Who knows, it may get better since he currently works in two labs in addition to classes. We both know that our priorities will change with a baby and we’re ready for that.

What do you and your partner do for a living? I am an editor and he’s an engineer.

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