Post # 46
GonnaBeMrsB: Sometimes we all need to vent which is exactly what you are doing here. And that’s okay. Other bees shouldn’t be taking such offense.
And by the way, go to the race! From one NASCAR fan to another make this your last hoorah before baby! And it’s a chase race! C’mon! 🙂
Post # 47
GonnaBeMrsB: I think its great that you were so honest. Probably most people don’t realize beforehand.
Post # 48
GonnaBeMrsB: You’re certainly allowed to vent. You posted on the Pregnancy, not TTC thread, so just ignore those that are upset.
I have 3 older sisters, all of which have been pregnant and have had kids. The oldest had 3 extremely easy pregnancies – no morning sickness, relatively easy deliveries, and everyone said pregnancy agreed with her. The second sister had horrible pregnancies, and was like you in that she couldn’t wait to deliver. The third sister had to go through IVF to become pregnant with her twins so I know her journey wasn’t easy.
My point is pregnancy is different for everyone. Sister #1 couldn’t understand what sister #2 was complaining about, while sister #3 didn’t want to hear any of it because she was having problems. You shouldn’t have to apologize to anyone because you’re uncomfortable and at the stage where you’re just done. That doesn’t make you ungrateful for being pregnant.
Hang in there!
Post # 49
Everyone has some thing in life that others really want and can’t have yet or perhaps never will. It doesn’t give you the right to shut down other people from venting if they have what you covet. The post was clearly labled in the PREGNANCY board. Get over yourself.
Vent away OP.
Post # 50
Gosh, I feel you. I HATEDDDD the pregnancy process..like, I would NEVER ever do it again. I have two kids by my ex husband but the 1st three months every single day I was sick. Then, your body…omg…I was soooo over it when I was 32 weeks.
Post # 51
Peanut-Sue: Peanut-Sue, I cant agree more. I absolutely concur. Because other women struggle to get pregnant (and I totally sympathise), how the heck is this post offensive because the OP is saying it is difficult for her (and it was very difficult for me)???? Just ugggh…
If you see the title, just dont read for crying out loud.
Post # 52
There are quite a few things on the list that I have no idea why you ” can’t” do. Seems like life would be much better for you if you didn’t place arbitrary conditions on yourself.
Post # 53
LittleLadyW: Sorry, but it’s ridiculous to tell people they can’t complain about the physical discomforts, pains, and inconveniences of pregnancy because other people are having trouble getting pregnant. Does that also mean I can’t complain about a plumbing emergency in my house while there are homeless people in the world? Or that a woman can’t complain about her verbally abusive husband because other women can’t get their boyfriends to commit to marriage? You’re essentially telling the OP that because her problems are (in your opinion) less significant than yours, she doesn’t deserve to have a voice. And guess what? Somewhere in the world, there’s an underage girl who got pregnant by rape, in a country where getting pregnant out of wedlock is punishable by death. I bet she’d love to be in your shoes right now. Are you being insensitive to her by complaining about not being pregnant?
Post # 54
I’m not sure where you are, but you can eat deli meat (warmed up if you want- I ate it cold) and have caffeine in moderation. Soft cheese are fine around the US supermarkets because everything has been pasteurized. Just an FYI, if you want to- you can have these things. I don’t see a problem, especially since you’re so far along!
I think I got lucky and even at 41w pregnant I still felt pretty good, like I could carry her another 2-3 weeks if I needed to. The worst parts for me were the hip pain, heartburn (I think I ate my way through 2 bottles of tums the last few months), and all the vaginal fluids (yuck). The pooping thing sucks, too.
Funny enough, I miserably failed my DL eye exam at about 32 w (and I was also hot and feeling rushed). They made me go see the eye doctor to get my license renewed. I was there and my vision was only slightly below average- no glasses needed. What a waste of time!
Post # 55
GonnaBeMrsB: My sister had two very rough pregnancies and she was MISERABLE towards the end. Her normal sunny/happy about everything attitude? Gone, only to be replaced by horrible never ending pain. So, from watching her go through it, I “get” you. I hope you feel better soon and have some relief come your way. Don’t feel bad about venting. I’ve never been pregnant, but if I ever am someday, I’m almost 100% certain there is going to be a day where I have a long ol list abt reasons why I am sick about being pregnant! lol
LittleLadyW: I am truly so sorry you are struggling, but the OP is struggling too and shaming her for a vent won’t help either of your situations. When I was 17, I was told I most likely could never have kids, so I understand your hurt. Some of us will never get to have a child, but that’s not an excuse to put down the women who are hurting and in constant pain and have had their worlds rocked by the experience of growing a human for 9 months…We can vent to eachother all we want, but maybe we shouldn’t get on the case of a woman who is in an uncomfortable stage of pregnancy and is probably just having a bad day!
Post # 56
GonnaBeMrsB: Ohh, can I join the venting??? I’m a little behind you (30 weeks tomorrow) but I am SO over: vomiting constantly, since May, or else taking medication that makes me unable to think; having no truly comfortable positions, just rotating through tolerable ones so I spread out the pain over my body; wearing clothes that do not fit my body, but not wanting to spend more money if I can avoid it; spending hours and hours in bed because I am so ill and unable to get anything done; feeling guilty that I am not a very good wife/dog mom/daughter/friend/employee/etc. right now, even though I am really trying my best; all of the appointments, needle sticks, peeing in a cup-which is becoming a bit difficult!; worrying about how decisions I am making about my body will directly affect my innocent baby and not just me. Right now I am so looking forward to the day when my vent will be about my baby eating/sleeping/pooping/etc. because then I will have my baby tol hold, AND other people can actually do something to help!
I really think it is the fact that there is often no relief day after day that makes it so bad-sure, some complains are fairly minor, but it is hard when you feel like you never get to be refreshed/recharged! Can you make this sporting event a joint holiday and/or birthday gift? Hang in there!
Post # 57
Thank you all so much for your replies. I am feeling quite a bit better today both physically and emotionally. Yesterday was just a bad “pregnancy” day for me.
I would like to address some of the questions raised though. With my last pregnancy, I was diagnosed with Pre-eclampsia and I had to be induced. Due to the fact that I had it with my last pregnancy, I am at a slightly higher risk for having it again with this one according to my doctor. A couple of weeks ago I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes – which means that I not only have to stick myself with a needle 4 x a day to check my blood sugar, but I am on a rather restrictive diet. Plus the doctor told me that gestational diabetes increases your risk of developing Pre-eclampsia as well, so combined with the fact that I already had it – I am definitely at a higher risk of getting it. All of this coupled with the fact that I will be 40 years old in a couple of weeks, they will be inducing me around the 38 week mark. My doctor said that at 40 years old, your placenta dies-off sooner than most which increases your risk of having a stillborn. Gestational diabetes causes the placenta to die off sooner as well – so he is not willing to take any chances. My doctor gave me a list of things that I could and couldn’t eat, so I am following his advice to a “T” until the baby is born.
This pregnancy certainly hasn’t been easy for me, and I do believe that perhaps my age plays quite a large part in it. I’m not in my 20’s anymore, and I hurt and ache all day long. In fact, one of the most hellish things that I had gone through was a bout of PUPPS a few weeks back. It started up on my lower legs and it was the itchiest, burning, awful red rash I ever had. I couldn’t sleep because of it, couldn’t wear certain clothing that would rub up against it, and overall couldn’t even THINK because the itching and redness was so severe. Thankfully after my doctor prescribed me an antihistamine combined with the use of Grandpa’s Pine Tar soap – the PUPPS subsided.
Sorry for rambling. But let me reiterate to you that I love my baby with all of my heart, I greatly look forward to being his Mom, and my husband and I were TTC for over 8 months. It’s just that last night I had a meltdown – I had had enough both physically and emotionally and I just had to vent. I felt if I vented on the pregnancy boards, hopefully I could find others who had felt the same way I do or had experienced the same thoughts/feelings I had. Thank you for allowing me to have a place to do that.
Post # 58
Sassygrn: Honestly, I think you need to stop. My mom had my brother at 4 1/2 months…yes, you read that right. 4 1/2 months along. He was in the NICU for three months at a hospital five hours away from where my family lived. Meaning, my mom was away from the rest of her kids for the majority of three months. My dad was a traveling salesman, so he was gone all the time too. I can’t imagine it was easy leaving their three other kids every week, but it must have been unbearable to leave their baby in the NICU, on the rare occassions they got to come home to see the other kids (aged 11, 6, & 4 at the time). Through all of that hard ship, NOT ONCE did my mom ever tell my sister to stop complaining during her rough pregnancies. She showed compassion because she too had been through pregnancy and knew the hardships of it.
Sorry for the rant, but I seriously do not understand the “my hard experience trumps yours card and therefore you can not complain because I had it harder.” Life is hard. We will all have different experiences and hardships. Showing compassion and kindness is what gets people through difficult times. Not “stop complaining because I had it harder.” Sheesh.
Post # 59
Butterfly6: AMEN! For some reason, this just made me so mad! I was in shock after reading the first reply to this post. It seems like people are getting chewed our for everything on here anymore. When I first joined the whole vibe was support. But it feels like that’s becoming obsolete anymore. And I don’t usually ever say anything, but I just couldn’t help it this time. I was pretty pissed.
Post # 60
I don’t know that it was meant to be funny, but I laughed throughout your entire post. It actually reminded me a lot of when my Fiance sometimes (but rarely) goes into long rants and finds everything to complain about, and I start laughing which in turn makes him laugh, too :).
I’m sure it is SO annoying to hear someone who isn’t carrying a child (ie, your DH) tell you that you can’t do certain things b/c of a baby. I’ve never been pregnant, but I’m sure it is completely frustrating. Hang in there, and I hope easier days are ahead for you!