(Closed) 4 days engaged, he's calling it off over a Facebook fight?

posted 5 years ago in Engagement
Post # 16
Member
448 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

View original reply
MrsKKtoBee :  I had a bad feeling they were older when I clocked the ’89’ on her username undecided

 

Whilst I believe that it’s for each couple to decide what is cheating or unacceptable in their relationship, I also don’t really feel that adding loads of random girls is the kind of behaviour that screams “ready to commit to one woman for the rest of my life”. It moves a bit closer to “touching” than “looking”.

Post # 17
Member
1758 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

The only person I know that has unfriended their boyfriend in a Facebook fight was my then 14 year old cousin 😳 I think unfriending him is completely immature and his reaction to it was even worse. 

I don’t think you guys are a good match or mature enough to be getting married, sorry bee. 

Post # 18
Member
4358 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Run, do not walk from this man. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

Post # 19
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

You are not immature, he is disrespectful. 

Post # 20
Member
477 posts
Helper bee

Just.. No. 

First, following so many people on social media is absurd and says a lot about a person. I wouldn’t want to do anything with a man lurking on pics of some women and being a fanboy. Social media is NOT for that.

Second, unfriending him was a dick move, but so was calling off the wedding. 

I don’t know what you’re doing, bee. He obviously didn’t start following 300 girls in a day.

Post # 21
Member
7556 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

Who would want to remain in a relationship that can so easily be thrown away over a fight over facebook. OP needs to move on.

Post # 22
Member
3936 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
msfrost89 :  

I’d also find his liking&following hundreds of random “hot girls” in our city’s network to be unacceptable. Your unfriending him could be seen as breaking up, too, but I don’t see it as such. He kept a few hundred back up plans in his queue and cried foul on a fair ball. Keep the ring, keep your composure, take a few days or weeks to consider the matter. I suspect that soon you’ll view this as a blessing in disguise. Just my $0.02.

Cheer up, Bee!

Post # 23
Member
2009 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

im sorry hes way older than me and your nearly my age… you BOTH need to seriously mature a lot befor getting married because this is how 15 year olds act and they aren’t allowed to marry (in most places) for a reason

Post # 24
Member
2778 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

While I get what you were thinking when unfriending him, you should have probably discussed it prior to doing it. Such as a “hey, I think our face books should be separate because…”.

However, the fact he was friending 300 women in the area should have had you going “bye Felipe” real fast. If not then, definitely now after he called off the wedding in the manner he did.

Focus on living your life. Do some things for you. Don’t settle for someone you aren’t on the same wavelength with. There are plenty of better suited people out there. Life is too short to spend time on one being a creeper on Facebook.

Post # 25
Member
7268 posts
Busy Beekeeper

36 yr old man following hundreds of “hot” women he doesn’t know on social media, breaks up with you via text when you call him out on that….sounds like a real winner OP. I would count your lucky stars that this has ended.

Post # 26
Member
1595 posts
Bumble bee

This is going to sound totally sexist, but I think it is creepy/weird when guys are totally into Facebook…I also question how much time he spends on Facebook if he is following/friending that many random people…a 36 year old man should be a little more engrossed in his job, and a little less consumed by Facebook…

Post # 27
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee

Ew. Sounds like boyfriend is keeping his options open (friending young hot girls at his age, he sounds like a gross old dinosaur) and trying to emotionally manipulate you by calling off the wedding. Though I don’t typically unfriend people just because we had an argument, the last time I did that was after I broke up with a guy.

Post # 28
Member
8601 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

He is creepy as hell with that FB activity, and yes it was immature to defriend the person who should be your best friend…

I would just let him cancel the engagement and move on with life!

Post # 29
Hostess
9666 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Trust is the most important thing in a marriage.

It sounds like you don’t trust him because 1) he lives in a different city and 2) he gives you reasons not to.

Then he threatens you with breaking off your engagement!? Oh hell no. That is not something you hold above someone’s head. Cancel the engagement and save yourself time, money and lots of heartache (and a future divorce).

Post # 30
Member
1073 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I’m also shocked by the ages. I won’t judge on you being immature because you can have whatever personality you want but it proves you both are not ready for marriage. To be honest I thought you were a teen, which is not good. Adults have face to face conversations and resolve issues without throwing tantrums. He seems worse although he’s older.

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