(Closed) 45 days until the wedding…do we get rid of groomsmen?

posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would try reaching out to them one more time, but instead of making the call or email a “reminder”, I would rephrase and reposition it.  Maybe if he let them know “Hey, I really want you guys to be a part of this, it would mean a lot to me but we have a lot to plan so I really need you guys to help with the attire”.  I think some guys (especially if they aren’t married or haven’t been in a wedding before) don’t realize everything that goes in to it and sometimes feel like it’s ok to slack off.

My fiance and I have struggled with this with a couple of his groomsmen but luckily his best man has stepped up to take the lead and make sure the others get their stuff done.

If after one more time, they still don’t get it, I’d say drop them.  If after your fiance explains to them how important it is to have them be a part of the day and they still don’t care, then sadly, they probably aren’t that great of friends to have anyways.

Post # 3
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would try reaching out to them one more time, but instead of making the call or email a “reminder”, I would rephrase and reposition it.  Maybe if he let them know “Hey, I really want you guys to be a part of this, it would mean a lot to me but we have a lot to plan so I really need you guys to help with the attire”.  I think some guys (especially if they aren’t married or haven’t been in a wedding before) don’t realize everything that goes in to it and sometimes feel like it’s ok to slack off.

My fiance and I have struggled with this with a couple of his groomsmen but luckily his best man has stepped up to take the lead and make sure the others get their stuff done.

If after one more time, they still don’t get it, I’d say drop them.  If after your fiance explains to them how important it is to have them be a part of the day and they still don’t care, then sadly, they probably aren’t that great of friends to have anyways.

Post # 3
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would try reaching out to them one more time, but instead of making the call or email a “reminder”, I would rephrase and reposition it.  Maybe if he let them know “Hey, I really want you guys to be a part of this, it would mean a lot to me but we have a lot to plan so I really need you guys to help with the attire”.  I think some guys (especially if they aren’t married or haven’t been in a wedding before) don’t realize everything that goes in to it and sometimes feel like it’s ok to slack off.

My fiance and I have struggled with this with a couple of his groomsmen but luckily his best man has stepped up to take the lead and make sure the others get their stuff done.

If after one more time, they still don’t get it, I’d say drop them.  If after your fiance explains to them how important it is to have them be a part of the day and they still don’t care, then sadly, they probably aren’t that great of friends to have anyways.

Post # 4
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We delt with this very same thing (my guy has three “bestfriends” too).  Anyways, has he tried calling them directly (some people don’t response to fb messages/texts/emails)? If he tried and they haven’t returned his call/messages, then call one last time and let them know that by (x date) if they haven’t respond or get in touch with him, they are no longer part of the wedding.  It will save you some guessing and let them know that the ball is in their court.  I hope things work out. 

Post # 5
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’d give them one more chance and list it as such.

Can’t be nice about it really anymore.

Post # 6
Member
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would say… send one more message, and if they get their act together, then they’re groomsmen. If they don’t show up wearing appropriate attire…then they’re not. (and what LucyMegs said.)

Post # 7
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

Dont send a message. Dont facebook. Pick up the telephone or drive over there.

The topic ‘45 days until the wedding…do we get rid of groomsmen?’ is closed to new replies.

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