Just going to offer my been-there comments, because I’ve been in a very similar situation recently.
It was slightly less than what you are being asked for, but still excessive, in my mind and in prior experiences ($375) and it was actually demanded by the Maid/Matron of Honor via a group text of everyone else. It caused an uproar because those that could afford said, great, wonderful, and those of us that couldn’t were looked at off when we questioned why we weren’t asked prior and why we weren’t allowed to help plan/make decisions.
I’ve been in many weddings, and even the one where we hosted at a restaurant, and only split among 4 people, didn’t cost more than $250 each and that was for favors, food, games, gift, everything, for everyone. So the $375 that didn’t even include food seemed excessive. (And I am in a big city area).
So I’ve been there and I feel for you. My takeaway in my situation is the bride (although a sweet person and I do truly believe that) was raised with money, always had more than enough of it, and didn’t understand that to some people that’s A LOT of money. I ended up not giving the full amount, only giving what I could afford (and yes, more than at most of my other friends showers).
Bottom line, MOH(s) should ask, never assume, what people are comfortable with first, and separately, to avoid any awkwardness or unfairness. A shower (or bachelorette) isn’t a given and should be given under the agreement of all those paying. Big, small, expensive, inexpensive – whatever. Everyone has to agree in advance. No blindly asking for money after. That is definitely rude.
Best of luck with everything. I feel you.