Post # 61
pearlybaker I don’t know. These women obviously believe they are in charge so I would let them figure the logistics out for themselves. I can just about guarantee that you offering to research other venues and ways to cut costs will not go over well.
I would honestly keep it direct and simple. I’m comfortable contributing X. I think a perfect follow up would be your offer to do invitations, design, DIY, etc. Don’t be too surprised if they have their own ideas there as well.
Post # 62
Me if you asked for $500 for a bridal shower…
Post # 63
pearlybaker : That’s crazy! I don’t understand why you need an “event” for a shower. I can’t believe the others would be on board with this cost. I don’t understand why the shower isn’t at someone’s house. Every shower I have been to has been a chill affair, usually at the Maid/Matron of Honor or Mother of the bride’s place.
Post # 64
That sounds more than generous both in wording and $$ !
Keep an eye on the bachelorette though , or the same thing may happen . I’d try and have a group talk and make sure it is not going to be a couple of the more more well-heeled ones saying “sure, $3,000 each sounds fine, I’ve always wanted to go to the Bahamas ….”
Post # 65
elderbee : 100% agree!
I’m also curious to know details about the wedding itself if this is what she expects for a shower..
Post # 66
Any response yet from the MOH?
Post # 67
You can tell she read the message but no response.
Post # 68
pearlybaker : WHATTTTTTTTT. I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY ASKED YOU TO PAY FOR THIS!!!!!! This is actually insane. These people are RUDE.
Post # 69
pearlybaker : any response yet?
Post # 70
just received a response but not to me directly, to the group. she said the mothers agreed to give more towards the shower so it now will be $200 each towards the shower and $50 towards the gift. Still kind of ridiculous since I said $200 was my limit for both but I guess it’s going to have to work.
Post # 71
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
pearlybaker : No fuck that. $200 is MORE than generous for a combination of shower contribution + gift. Tell her that continues to be your limit.
Post # 72
Ugh. I dont get why people dont just host showers at homes. If Mother-In-Law or whatever wants a restaurant venue then she can foot the bill! I just threw a kick ass boozy shower (handle of premium vodka, CASE of prosecco, delicious foods) for my friend…. and we paid 100$ each (5 of us). And a group gift thing is silly…. I would probably just pay the 250 to avoid drama.
Post # 73
Oh hell no! You stated your budget. Stick up for yourself and reiterate your budget as £200! Maid/Matron of Honor is totally disregarding you. She might have money, but she’s totally without class. £200 or nothing… put your foot down now, or watch those costs get nudged up closer to the time! Xx
Post # 74
exactly. I’m probably just going to agree to pay the $250 to avoid any further drama even though I’m so against this high maintence crap that I didn’t put my girls through.
Next battle will be the destination bachelorette. Can’t go to anywhere that has Zika so I’m sure they will be thrilled about that.
Post # 75
pearlybaker : No way! That is ridiculous. I second scissorgirl : how she phrased the reply is perfect. Polite yet firm, and willing to help with reasonable requests. Good luck – I’m sure that this is going to be the first of many offenses made by the Maid/Matron of Honor