(Closed) 8 Months…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I feel everything you’re feeling right now.  I’m excited, but I get really nervous if I think about it too hard.  I worry that things won’t go right or won’t be good enough. My parents have both been divorced twice and my fiance’s were never really together, just lived together, not even really in a relationship.  I’ve lived with my fiance for three years too and I just graduated in May with my first full time out of school job and it’s a night shift so I get the slump (he works mornings, school in the afternoon).  SO I totally get you.  If you need to have someone shake some sense into you, so do I.

Post # 4
Member
1559 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I feel like this could have been my post exactly…. Fiance and I have been together for 4 years, living together for 2, there’s a lot of uncertainty about jobs after our wedding (we’re finishing Grad School around the wedding… him right before, me right after) and there are times where spending time with him is the last thing on my mind. 

To top it off, we’re paying for the bulk of the wedding, and I’m a DIY fanatic/crazy who insists that I don’t need to hire a florist, DJ, coordinator, etc. We will have lots of help from friends and family, but I’m really focused on not paying people to put things together. 

All I can tell you is that it’s ok. Try to find people to help you with the DIY stuff, and after a while, you just have to make a decision. Just say “I’m doing X thing for centerpieces, Y for the flowers, Z for the favors” etc. and then stick to it. It’s SO tempting with all the gorgeous DIY weddings to want to do all of it, but just remember- even some of those DIY weddings had coordinators and stylists to put the actual day together.

You aren’t Wonder Woman, so take some pressure off yourself and just do the projects you like, and don’t worry about what others think! 

And as for you and Fiance having a slump- We’ve all been there. It drives me nutty seeing all my friends who are getting married early in their relationships who are just so excited to be getting married, but lets face it…. people in our situation have seen the day-to-day of what marriage will look like already. We know it isn’t always fun and pretty and sunshine and butterflies. But if you can put up with the frustration, the anger, the boring part, and all that and still feel in love with the person you’re marrying, then that’s all that matters. 

Post # 5
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I agree with tinylittlebird, it drives me nuts too to see people get married so early and be so caught up in it without actually thinking about how things are going to be.  And that seeing that it’s not all wonderful and perfect all the time helps a lot with everything.  I also want to add that I feel like I’ve felt more pressure to make things as perfect as possible within my budget because we’ll have been together a little over five years whereas most of the people we know get married within six months to a year.  I don’t know why it’s caused me more pressure (maybe it feels like there should be more time to make things perfect?) but I feel like it has (this may only apply to the people I know, I’m also an anxiety-ridden person which may contribute Smile).  

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