- 2 years ago
Okay bees settle in for a story.
My Boyfriend and I have known each other since 18, and started dating at 21 (i’m 30 now, so have been dating on/off for the last 9 years).
My Boyfriend is not romantic. We have no anniversary. And, we’ve been on and off for that 9 years because of:
1. Job moves (I went to NY for a job)
2. Being young/stupid when we 1st dated (we’ve matured a lot now that we don’t have the time to fight over shampoo)
3. Me getting fed up with his lack of commitment/taking me for granted when I live with him
Nearly a year ago we moved back in together, after the past 2 years living apart and trying to date other people. We ended up getting back together and I moved BACK in with him only after having (what I thought to be a serious) conversation that I wasn’t moving back in to be his “roomate”. He agreed and said he “wouldn’t want to live together again unless it was serious and would result in marriage”. Wow great! Right? Wrong.
That convo was 9 month ago. I moved back in with him in Aug 2017, and yep here I am in April. OF COURSE like any woman I tracked every holiday/vacation in between.
My dads 60th passed, trips passed, Christmas passed, New Years passed, Valentine’s Day passed… no ring.
You can probably guess, but I lost my cool. I gave my Boyfriend or Best Friend an ultimatum that I would not be happy when the 1 year anniversary of living with him rolled around.
Is that too far bees??? 🐝
He didn’t even know the price of a ring when I pressed. More saddening, he said he needs time to know for certain it’s meant to be, and doesn’t know if he wants kids (I’m now 30 going on 31 so I momentarily passed out @ that comment). He also told me he needs time to plan it and save money (he remodeled his house recently),and that an ultimatum wasn’t fair and I should have “nudged him if it got to Dec and it hadn’t happened”.
After much pressing, he agreed to give me an answer 1 way or the other in a month. No ring, but his thoughts. But this all seems like more excuses/stalling.
I want kids, which I’ve let my Boyfriend know before, and am an all over bitter, angry, sad, and resentful mess. He is also very bitter I gave him an ultimatum or told him the cost of the ring I wanted (15k but offered to help buy it).
Did I ruin it bees? Am I out of line? Was I simply duped? Is this my biological clock? I’m a successful business woman (I make double what my Boyfriend does), and have zero patience left.
Now bitter business lady