- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014 - Lodge
When I see all these posts about weddings that went perfectly, it makes me sad. Yes, things could have gone worse, nothing major happened but there were just little things here and there that made me feel like no one cared about me feelings.
First it started on Friday when we were decorating. Lots of people where there helping and I appreciated it, especially 2 of my mom’s friends who let us borrow an arch, some decor and a table for our sand ceremony. They decorated the arch and it was gorgeous. Of course on Friday I had last minute things to do, plus my kids were in school so I had to pick them up, otherwise I would have done more decorating. We also couldn’t set out chairs until the day of because the ceremony was outdoors, so that sucked. I wanted christmas lights strung on the ceiling above the dance floor but we didn’t have time so we were waiting until after the rehearsal that night.
Rehearsal went well but immediately after my mom locked the doors to the venue because we had “reservations” for dinner. First, it was the Pizza Ranch, you don’t do reservations. They can reserve the party room but its not a fancy place, its buffet (and delicious btw). Well, by hustleing everyone out the lights didn’t get put up, she locked my car keys, cell phone, shoes and my DH’s keys in the venue. I had to literally chase her down the road to get the venue keys from her. All because she was “starving”. OK whatever, I’m over it. Dinner was good, I had fun with the wedding party and afterwards I went home with my Maid/Matron of Honor R, Jr Bridesmaid or Best Man K and Flower Girl T. We stayed up talking and went to bed around 10:30.
The next morning we had hair and make-up at 8:00am. Drank mimosa’s and had fun. Hindsight 8:00am is too early for hair and make-up when the wedding isn’t until 5:00pm and pictures aren’t until 3:00pm. But 8:00 is what my salon suggested based on the time frame I gave hem so I went with it. After hair and makeup we met at one of my Bridesmaid or Best Man Ns houses, and then headed to the venue. My Bridesmaid or Best Man A was at her mom’s an hour away getting ready because she flew in from North Carolina and is 5 months pregnant so I didn’t want to make her get up really early etc. At the venue the girls and I set up ceremony seating and did all the stuff that didn’t get done the night before. I then get a message from Bridesmaid or Best Man A that on her way to meet us she was in a car accident. She’s ok but going to be late meeting us….
I call my mom to see where she is and if she can help us finish setting up since its noon and I haven’t even started getting ready, my hair is flat etc. Only to have her completely bitch me out that she wanted everything to be done the day before but no one else seemed to be in a hurry about it and she had stuff to do before coming and wasn’t going to rush to get there….thanks mom.
My Grandma S, Aunt J, Aunt C, Aunt V, Uncle J and cousins C, S and M arrive and are appalled that I’m not ready, that I’m still setting up and take over with the outdoor decor (we were afraid if we left them out they would be blown over or taken). I get ready and start relaxing and having fun with my girls.
Photographer shows up and we start taking photos. Ceremony starts and it was short and sweet, which is what we wanted. Oh I forgot to mention my lace dress kept getting caught on the deck outdoors where we were having pictures and stuff. I have a rip in it.
Reception starts and I’m enjoying myself. Our Ring Bearer C wants a drink of punch and I’m already filling my glass so I help him, instead of saying his glass is full enough and waiting for me to turn off the spout he pulls his glass away (he’s 10 and my son), red punch spills all over the floor and the front of my dress. I didn’t yell at him even though he knows better but I wasn’t happy. My reception pictures all have a red stain down the front of my dress.
We paid the DJ until 11pm but at 8:30pm my mom decides to start cleaning up the reception venue. So people start leaving. I told my mom to stop cleaning up because people where assuming she was kicking them out and leaving and she said she was only cleaning the tables that people had left from…people hadn’t left they were outside on the deck getting keg beer. I had more than 1 person say they were leaving BECAUSE they thought we were cleaning up. No matter how many times I explained this and tried to get my mom to STOP picking up so I could enjoy my wedding reception, she wouldn’t admit that’s why people were leaving.
So around 11 I’m tired, cranky, sore and disappointed that my day was such a blur and I break down in the men’s dressing room with my Darling Husband. He’s trying to comfort me and I’m so angry I just want to get into a fist fight with my mom (FYI I’m not a violent person). The whole week I kept forgetting to take my meds so my hormones are all out of wack. I have anxiety meds I take for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (whole other stories) that I haven’t taken. So then Sunday after the wedding I wake up with my period when I’m really only 2 weeks into my birth control pack because I was not faithful with my meds last week.
The icing on the cake…Sunday night I get a text message from DH’s female cousin who was my roommate years ago and who set us up. I get like 3 texts in a row about how I’m a shitty friend for not mentioning her in my wedding speech (I didn’t even have one planned I just winged it and forgot to thank a few people who helped with the wedding, I hate giving speeches). That we haven’t been “friends” for a while and its nice to know that I was just using her to get a ring on my finger. WTF!?! So I text back that most people already know the story of how we met, most people meet their spouses through someone else and I’m greatful she introduced us but she had nothing to do with our relationship after the initial meeting, that was all me and him making it work. It was already a crappy day for me because of the stress and I can’t believe she’d call me out like that. I always thought we were friends, we both have families and houses and life just sucks and gets in the way of hanging out like we used to. That’s not the end of that though. I of course was crying again and so angry that someone who I thought was a friend would say mean things to me the day after my wedding…when I get a text from DH’s cousins ex girlfriend (yeah its like an episode of Jerry Springer) who was also set up with the cousin by this same friend and they hang out more than we do now…she basically calls me a back stabbing bitch because I used Roommate G. Now that I have a ring on my finger my true colors are showing, the facebook status was a lame attempt to mend burned bridges (my facebook status thanked people for coming and I was sorry I couldn’t talk to everyone and I hoped people understood I was not thinking of anyone in particular, just in general so people didn’t think I was ignoring anyone intentionally and I HAD talked to roommate G after the ceremony for about 15 minutes which was longer than I had talked to anyone other than my bridesmaids and DH).
I blocked ex girlfriend (again Darling Husband cousin’s ex Girlfriend not mine lol) and Roommate G and I patched things up. I think she realized what an uber bitch she was being for trying to rain on my parade, but I’m still pretty pissed about the whole thing.
Hindsight, I should have eloped, not had my mom help with ANY of the wedding. But I am MARRIED!!! And I did have some fun (I laughed a LOT because my shoes kept getting stuck and during the cake “cutting” I got frosting up my nose, even though we were not shoving cake in our faces, it was just awkward to have huge cupcakes) and the non professional pictures turned out awesome. So here is some of my recap.
CAKE! We had 6 flavors and OMG were they orgasmic. I have a S’mores in this photo and Darling Husband had Strawberry Shortcake.
Our getaway car….that wouldn’t start. I have 2 pictures I’m waiting on, one is him trying to “fix” the car and I’m looking irritated. The next is me under the hood “fixing” the car while he looks on lol.
Me and my daughter Tessa
Looking fierce as I’m throwing the bouquet
Looking on as our Ring Bearer (my youngest son) tells us a story
Introducing Mr and Mrs
Groomsmen holding me up
No idea what this look was about lol
Darling Husband and his dad and daughter with me, my kids, and parents
Giving our photographer the “finger”…..ring finger that is lol
Waiting to walk down the aisle
Some before ceremony pictures under our arch.
This is my great aunt but she didn’t think she was going to make it because of her husbands illness reasons. She did make it and this picture shows the wedding program door really well in the back. I loved my door.
Me and the girls
Getting in the grass was a chore, ugh the dress didn’t want me to do anything other than stand.
Our “Bridesmaids” pose and probably my favorite picture so far. LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!
My brother and I and my oldest son (JR Groomsman) photo bombing lol
Maid/Matron of Honor and Flower Girl (Youngest daughter Tessa) in the dressing room
Pre ceremony selfie (From left to right: Bridesmaid or Best Man A, Me, Bridesmaid or Best Man N, Maid/Matron of Honor R and Bridesmaid or Best Man K (step daughter)
Dress was tight and the panel kind of ripped, this was my face when I heard Bridesmaid or Best Man A (in the picture) say “Shit”. I fit in it, I couldn’t sit but that’s minor lol.
8 am Mimosa’s at Bridesmaid or Best Man N’s house before heading to the venue.
Russian dictator shot glasses for our pre ceremony shots lol