(Closed) 95% of guests are not overnighters: Do I HAVE to send Save-the-Dates??

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I don’t think STD’s are neccessary AT ALL and I didn’t do them. I think they are cute and trendy, but ultimately unneccessary. I think a personal call or email would be just as appreciated, if not more. That way you get a chance to chat and share your excitement.

Post # 4
2496 posts
Buzzing bee

@riakd:  Nope, not at all. I’ve read that STDs are really only necessary if you have a lot of Out of Town guests.

Post # 5
3751 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I’m only doing them because I’m having a Friday night wedding and want to give everyone the heads up far in advance for work time off, etc. Otherwise I don’t think they’re necessary, just inform the out of towners!

Post # 6
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Word of mouth is probably fine. I think you have the right idea about just contacting the families, so just go ahead and do that. I was planning to send out save the dates but I’ve already heard from relatives about friends and family marking their calendars now…I was really happy to hear people were doing that on their own as soon as they found out the date. Saved us a lot of money and trouble!

Post # 7
10450 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

Not necessary. Everyone invited has known our wedding date since we set it (almost a year ago). If you want them as guests at your wedding, you/fiancé/parents probably speak to them regularly enough to mention the date. 

Post # 8
1227 posts
Bumble bee

Not necessary at all, and unless it’s a Destination Wedding I think they are a waste of money. You can call or email people if you want to give them a heads up. 

I also think they complicate thing because once you send a STD you pretty much HAVE to invite them to the wedding. I don’t know about you, but my guest list has changed several times over the past few months and I feel better knowing that if someone pisses me off between now and the summer I’m not obligated to invite them because I already advised them they could expect an invitation. 

Post # 9
3336 posts
Sugar bee

I think they are a HUGE waste of money, and almost always end with someone wanting to change their mind, or inviting someone who they maybe wouldn’t have.


Post # 10
3682 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Word of mouth is probably fine, but you do need to let people know about your wedding in plenty of time just so they don’t make other plans.

Post # 11
6261 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

Why don’t you compromise and send a quickly designed e-mail save the date to everyone you KNOW you are going to invite? Then he gets them, and you don’t have to spend money on them

The topic ‘95% of guests are not overnighters: Do I HAVE to send Save-the-Dates??’ is closed to new replies.

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