(Closed) a bit miffed… has anyone else been in this situation?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 47
Member
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@rawrrrrr:  We had a similar thing in my family- two of my cousins got married a few months apart. I realize they’re not sisters, but both of them are like best friends because neither of them have sisters. I wonder if it was like this for them too. 

I can tell you, having been a guest that attended both weddings, that the weddings were just different. It never occurred to me to compare them. They were just completely different, and they are beautiful memories that I love and will always remember. 

I’m sorry your dad keeps making that comment. He is being really lame. Not sure what you’re relationship is like with him but if it was my dad I would tell him to stop. My dad is often extremely insensitive just because he doesn’t realize how what he says affects other people. But if I tell him up front, he would apologize and stop. 

Also, I have two sisters, and even if the way you feel sounds “petty” or people think it’s immature or whatever, I would totally feel that way too if my sisters and I were in your situation. And I would be made to feel petty for feeling that way. I think it’s completely normal for you to feel upset. I also think it’s true that you have to make choices about how you think, act, and feel about your situation. Be compassionate to yourself. Take some time to be totally pissed or sad or however you feel and get it out. Find a friend who will let you vent about it for this purpose. And then, if you want to enjoy your engagement year, move past it. There may be times in the planning process when it will come up, and those times will be tricky to navigate. 

This also sounds insane, but if you really can’t get past it, you could always have your wedding later. I am on a two year engagement and let me tell you, this has been very stress free, taking our time getting things done. Sky’s the limit!

Post # 48
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I feel bad saying this, but honestly this is what happens when you put a deadline on your fiance to propose and plan it completely– if you were still waiting, just enjoying being together and not focusing on when/if you were getting a proposal, then you would just be happy for your sister and enjoying her time. As you said, she’s older and she’s been waiting for Mr. Right longer than you– enjoy being sister of the bride!

Post # 49
Hostess
2007 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@rawrrrrr:  Understand where your frutration and worry can come from. I just wanted to say don’t worry, your wedding will not be compared, esp if your sister’s has some Indian flaire going on, they have very lavish LARGE weddings that is distinctly not western in any way. So your wedding will just be different even if you go traditional 

 

Also I am sure her Fiance didn’t propose now to spite you…guys don’t really think like that really, and 2 years is plenty of time to get engaged btw. 

 

Hope you get your ring soon! Fingers crossed.

 

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