(Closed) A bit worried:/

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Just talk to your Boyfriend or Best Friend about it when the time comes. Chances are your Boyfriend or Best Friend has a good enough head on his shoulders to not do anything stupid. I bet, out of those 40 guys there, somebody is trustworthy enough to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.

Post # 4
Member
10216 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Okay.  I’m going to be blunt: You’re tripping!! I mean he’s asking you to marry you because he loves you and he’s excited and telling all of his friends. He seems reasonable and not the type to cheat on you especially with a stripper.  Let him know your concerns or ask him how he’d feel if you went to Chippendales with all of your girlfriends.  Even if you don’t trust his friend that has nothing to do with the trust of your soon to be fiance.  He is a man and makes his own decisions.  And if there are 40 guys at a strip club they’ll probably be having fun and drinking etc…

Post # 5
Member
900 posts
Busy bee

My husband ended up at a stripclub.  Do I love the idea?  Meh.  But it’s what guys do and it isn’t such a big deal to me in the long run.  And I didn’t even think for a second he would end up fooling around with some stripper.

So it kind of begs the question…why do you want to marry someone who you are even the slightest bit concerned would hook up with a stripper at his bachelor party?  I think that the guy you choose to marry should leave you feeling no doubts on that issue whatsoever!

Post # 6
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I second what the other two just said.  I think you need to calm down and be excited about getting engaged.  Then start thinking about other events to come.

Post # 8
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Agree with above posters.  I feel like the bachelor party is kind of a rite of passage for guys, and more for the guys than the bachelor.  My Fiance isn’t doing the strip club thing but I wouldn’t really care if he was.  There’s typically lots of rules at these clubs and I doubt your Fiance is going to go running off with a stripper ;o)

Post # 9
Member
219 posts
Helper bee

I agree with Crebre80 you are really tripping!! That is the last thing you need to be worry about! Please just chillax and stop worrying!

Post # 10
Member
10216 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Waiting: Dear I think your fear is really unfounded.  He seems to be a really good guy and you really do deserve a good guy and to be happy. I may be off point with this, but I think you may be bringing things that happened in previous relationships and pushing it onto this one.  He is a completely different guy from anyone you have ever dated or even been married to if you have been married before.  Look at him for what he is today, remind yourself of how he makes you feel every day.

Post # 13
Member
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Been there done that….=P

(sometimes we just have to be told we’re being ridiculous. This happens a lot with weddings, just be prepared to lose sight of your rationality)

PS i think all those super nasty thigns are definitely the minority and rare occassion that gets overly publicized. I don’t know anyone personally who’s had an experience like that!! and EVERY guy i know would cringe at the thought of some of those stories

Post # 14
Member
325 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Honestly, I’ve been to a strip club (with my Fiance and his friend. Um. We were drinking. Don’t judge ^_^) and I know Mr. Spin has been to strip clubs, pretty much just when some of his single friends are like “YEAH Strippers! Let’s go!” or for b-parties. And he tells me that, really, it is just a little sad and uncomfortable–you’re watching girls get naked, yeah, but they’re only doing it for money, they don’t care about you and frankly, it’s kinda weird for guys to hang out specifically so they can get turned on and then do nothing about it. It’s weird. ^_^

If you really are afraid of the unknown, go. It’s a little weird to go as a girl because you will get some attention, but I basically wanted to go because I was curious. It wasn’t that great, it wasn’t that scary. I honestly spent the time critiquing skills and music choice (sometimes favorably, a lot not). ^_^

Post # 15
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

1. all strippers are NOT nasty and i find it very amusing that people make such blantant assumptions about them but the menfolk that frequent the establishments and are the catalyst for the “nasty things” (your words) that happen are excused. i would say a majority of ladies have a look but dont touch rule, espeically in a group situation.

2. i suggest you sent some boundries for his B-party. eg, is he alllowed to have lap dances?  my hubby had a party and there were mulitple live girl sex acts happening. hubby tells me there seemed to be 2 groups of guys on the night, the younger, single or perving that were front row watching the show but the marjority was the attached/married guys that were at the back having a few beers and talking sports & work and eating.

 

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