Post # 1
A friend of mine just let me know that she is getting married 2 weeks before me. She has been on-again, off-again planning a wedding for awhile (i think this is the 3rd date set?) so I had planned on being a bridesmaid (she told me the first time around that I was). But, she has given me an easy out, saying that she has to cut her bm’s from 7 to 5, that I wouldn’t be one of the ones to cut, but that if I was going to be too busy that I could opt out.
I told her right away that it was totally up to her on if I was in or out of the wedding. (She’s not in mine, but we’ve been friends since elementary school).
Now I’m wondering if I should opt out? Maybe that makes her decision easier, and would mean I don’t have to buy a bridesmaids dress or worry about helping with her shower, bachelorette party, etc. I still plan on helping her along the way (we’re going to a bridal show together this weekend, and I will probably do her invites since I’m a graphic designer.)
What would you do?
Post # 3
I would stay in. If she decides she wants to “cut” you, fine, but your being a Bridesmaid or Best Man doesn’t conflict with your wedding.
Post # 4
If you can afford the dress and want to do it go for it… All I am making my girls do is get the dress and turn up, so as long as she isn’t going to dump a whole pile of stuff on you to do AND you WANT to be bridesmaid go for it, if you don’t want to be Bridesmaid or Best Man then she is giving you an easy excuse out 🙂
Post # 5
hmmm I don’t know if I would personnaly want to be in someone elses wedding two weeks before my wedding. I know there will be a lot of loose ends to tie up , and I’ll want to be relaxing… not sure if I’d want to chuck out a lot of extra money and time so close to our own date…but if that doesn’t bother you , then go for it! It also depends on how close you are to her. If it was a best friend, then I would, but if it’s a friend you’ve lost touch with then maybe you could let the other girls take priority?
Post # 6
@Mrs.H2B: Thats kind of what I was thinking. We were super close at one time, but now we just see each other on the 1 or 2 ‘girls nights’ we have throughout the year. But at the same time, I’m going to be at the wedding anyways, so why not be in it? So I’m torn.
Post # 7
There’s a lot of money involved though to be in a wedding compared to being a guest. I know that we will have final payments to make a couple of weeks before our wedding leading up to the last minute and I won’t be wanting to think about hair/makeup/dress/…. whatever else you need to buy for someone elses wedding. It can get so expensive. If the money isn’t an issue though, I don’t see a reason why you shouldn’t be in the wedding party… especially if you’ll be going to all of her events anyways, like the bachelorette party and showers etc.
Post # 8
personally, I would opt out. for me, money and stress two weeks before.. eeeek! but that is just me! and if she is not in yours, this is my thought process!