Post # 1
For Chinese American brides, I’m wondering how your organized your day. So far, I’ve got door games planned in the morning, followed by everyone going to the beach for our Western ceremony. I’ve seen a couple programs already and this seems like what most of you have done. However, was it weird at all in your case for the groom to see you before the ceremony? I just recently thought about playing the games, so the idea of my guy seeing me in my dress before the ceremony is still new and sort of strange.
Also, for those who played wedding games during the reception, did you spread them out or did you do them all in a chunk, and, about how long will/did yours last for?
My final question is about the tea ceremony. We are planning on doing only one during the reception including his and my side of the fam. Since it’s usually just for the groom’s side here, what order do you guys recommend we give them tea in? Also, since we have few relatives coming (17 total counting parents, siblings, cousins, uncles/aunts), and because we’re foregoing the hung bao, I’m worried that the ceremony may just feel too short or awkward. Right now, I could see people sitting, taking the tea, drinking it, and leaving without saying anything! What ideas do you have for having this go more smoothly?
Post # 3
I’m doing door games before the ceremony and many friends/relatives have done the same so it’s not strange to have the groom see the bride prior to the wedding. It actually affords us more time and flexibility in terms of getting photos taken, etc. and for our wedding party/families to mingle throughout the day.
As for the tea ceremony, I’ve seen it done towards the end of the ceremony (basically after everything else). The bride’s parents were served first, then the groom’s parents. It went quite smoothly, the officiant said a little bit about the tradition beforehand and then made some concluding remarks afterwards.
Post # 4
Did you do it at the end of the Western ceremony? I was planning to do that in the white dress, and change into a qipao for the tea ceremony later. If you did the tea ceremony early on, did you change? And, did you change from your white to red back to white dresses??
Post # 5
I think we’ll be doing it differently from what has already been mentioned. We’re doing the door games, and then tea ceremony for the bride side. We will then shuttle over to the groom side and do the tea ceremony there, followed by lunch to all in attendance.
When we do tea ceremony, we tend to start with the eldest family member first (in family order). And we usually do my dad’s side first, followed by my mom’s side. I don’t think the tea ceremony will be awkward – you are giving them tea and something to nibble on, correct? They can just take the tea and give you well wishes!
Usually at weddings we have, this is how its done, and I also plan on wearing a kwa.
After lunch, we head over to our ceremony site (same as our reception site) to have the ceremony. I’m still not sure about the before pictures at this point, because while he will have already have seen me during the morning tea ceremony, he would not have seen me in my wedding dress yet!
Following ceremony will be cocktails and dinner immediately following.
Post # 6
Games at the reception is usually done at the same time. If you are having a Chinese reception and have shark fin soup on the menu, you would get ready right after the soup.
And for the tea ceremony, the bride’s parents first, to thank them for raising you. Then the groom’s, saying hi to your new family. You know, the tea ceremony does not have to be long, it is not meant to be long.
Regarding the dress, have you considered wearing a chinese wedding dress for the tea ceremony? For chinese bride, they usually wear at least 3 dresses thur out the day. One for the tea ceremony, one for the Western ceremony, and one for the reception. I have had friend who wear 5 different outfits just for the reception…
One for tea ceremony
One for western ceremony
one for entering the reception hall and cutting cake
one for playing games
one for saying goodbye to your guests
It is not even an uncommon thing to do for a Chinese bride.
Post # 7
I find this: http://www.squidoo.com/chinese-wedding-order-of-events
It contains all the information you need to know about what happens during a Chinese wedding.
Please be sure to check it out.
[email protected] Wedding