Post # 1
The majority of our guests (including our immidiate family) were very supportive about pushing our wedding back to next year. However, a few guests whined to us saying we should just elope instead of waiting 11 months for a wedding. If we had a choice we would. However, it wouldn’t be fair to our families to miss out on something as big as our wedding. Plus, we want our family there. But people fail to realize that planning a wedding cost a crap full of money.
We want to have the best wedding we can afford. I don’t understand why people can accept that. What do you want us to do? Go into debt? Too bad we can’t un-invite them because they received a STD before pushing back.
Post # 3
This would drive me up the wall! Some people can be really rude and just forget that this is YOUR wedding. You can’t please everyone, just worry about yourself.
Post # 4
@NYMeetsPA: People are so self-absorbed sometimes, ugh ! Are they helping you pay the bill? No ? They they need to shut up, seriously.
Post # 5
I’m sorry, that is incredibly annoying to deal with. Forget them and keep doing what’s best for you guys. People are always full of advice on what your wedding should be and are not afraid to tell you point blank. Good for you for doing what’s best for you as a couple!
Post # 6
@TeeBee25: FI and I have no regrets pushing back our original date. If anything, we’re glad that the new date was available. It gives our guests to watch the fireworks at the local fair at the end of the night. With our original date, it wouldn’t happen.
We can’t please everyone but at the end of the day, FI and I made peace with our decision. Too bad not everyone is appluding us for being mature, money conscious adults.
Post # 7
That sucks. Pushing back the date is hardly unheard of and many people have long engagements. Maybe you just shouldnt invite those complainers. They aparently wouldn’t have a problem is you called off the big wedding and eloped instead, since they don’t think a wedding is worth it. Why would they want to come and eat the food you paid for and enjoy the party you throw if it’s not worth it?
(I know you probably still have to invite them, I just think they’re being very rude and hypocritical if they attend).
Post # 8
Is there a chance that these were facetious comments that you’re reading too much into? Or, that they aren’t criticizing the pushing back your wedding so much as the waiting a year to start your married life together?
I’d be annoyed by the comments, but I’d try not to read too much into them. If you’re okay with the decision, that’s all that matters.
Post # 9
And you want to know the best part of all of this: the wedding stress is gone. We can plan and pay for our wedding stuff in our own pace while taking care of any non-wedding debt we need to pay before we’re married. We want to start our lives as a married couple debt free and some extra cash for ourselves to enjoy.
Post # 10
@abbie017: Most of the comments were along the lines “why not downsize and keep the date?” We’re not even spending too much for our wedding. And if we downsize stuff (we’re keeping our flowers simple, cutting videography altogether, having a church wedding instead of an outdoor ceremony), we need money left over for us to enjoy our life together. We can’t spend all our life savings/401K on one day.
Besides, the other main reason why we pushed back is that we weren’t happy about the planning process. It made me depressed. I was not going to tell all our guests about wedding planning drama. So we took a break and came up with this as we ring in the new year.
Post # 11
@NYMeetsPA: I’m a bit confused, it sounds like you sent your STDs out with your original date.
If that’s the case, I can see why people would be a bit annoyed. Some people need to book off work well in advance. It affects other future plans, vacations, etc. As it is, some people already view STDs as a bit self-centred (personally, I don’t have a problem with them) and then you haven’t even followed through with the date.
I am sorry people are giving you a tough time though. That doesn’t help with anything.
Post # 12
@AB Bride: We sent that around Thanksgiving. Then made that decision two months later. We called all of our guests who received a STD and they were okay with it. The majority of our guests are local or within a 2-hour driving distance. The ones who live beyond that distance were very supportive. Sadly, the ones who were complaining were extended family members from my side of the family.
It could be worse. My brother and his FI were engaged for nearly 2 years and yet to set an official date. They even took our potential idea of having a beach wedding only to not follow through.
Post # 13
@NYMeetsPA: Who says you can’t uninvite them? 😉 (I kid, I kid… not really)
If they’d rather you elope than postpone, they’re essentially saying they don’t care to be there anyway, since with elopement, they wouldn’t be there for the wedding.
So what does it matter if you’re postponing the wedding and don’t invite them? Or they can decline the new date… either way.
I can understand if they’ve already asked for the time off or made non-refundable arrangements, but at the end of the day, whoever pays, says!