Post # 1
Good news, we found the venue of our dreams. Bad news, space and budget restrictions will only allow for us to have 36 guests at the ceremony and 65 at the reception. We want to fill it to capacity because even at 65 we are leaving people out that we really would love to have. We are thinking about sending out our “a-list” (the people we need there the most, family and very close friends) and once we’ve recieved the RSVP’s sending out a second batch “b-list” to fill in for the people who can’t make it. Is this the worst idea ever? If not, when should we send out the first batch, and when the second? Our wedding date is 4/28/2012. Also, what is the best way to avoid people assuming they can bring dates? We can only allow guests in serious relationships a date. PLEASE HELP! THANK YOU!!!
Post # 3
Be sure you love the small venue more then the idea of having all your family and friend because to me if I couldn’t invite everyone there would be no way I’d pick a small venue that left me feeling I couldn’t invite so done I really wanted there based on space. I am just to close to my family and friends…. But in the end it is your day. Good luck!
Post # 4
@texmax: I think an A list and B list is fine. You just need to make sure the A list has an earlier RSVP deadline to allow time to mail the B list invites and have them RSVP without them knowing they are “B list”.
One thing to think about though is that some people may be very offended to be invited to the reception only and not be “important enough” to be invited to the ceremony.
As for the guest issue, you can just put on the invite “We have reserved 1 seat in your honor. __ of 1 will attend” so it is very clear you are only inviting ONE person.
Post # 5
Yeah, we talked about weighing out the small venue/more guest ratio and of course we care more about having our friends any family there, but with our budget all of the other venues we looked at (and didn’t love) would only allow us 10-15 more guests.
Post # 6
We’re doing the A-list, B-list, except it’s really more an Out of Town v. In-Town. Since a lot of my college friends and family are Out of Town (and I think it’s unlikely that they’ll come, but want to send an invite anyway) we’re inviting them with an RSVP date about a month and a half before the wedding. As the ‘no’s come in, we’ll figure out how many in-town friends we can invite and give them an RSVP date of three weeks before. At least I think that’s how we’re making it work!