(Closed) A little mean or good idea?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
1188 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Based on this and your other posts, you are not ready to get married and especially not to this guy.

Post # 3
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

Are you actually interested in going to this out of state school? Or is this a bluff? If you’re bluffing then it’s definitely not a good idea. 

I agree with PP. 

Post # 4
Member
3526 posts
Sugar bee

He already told you he doesn’t believe in marriage and has been extremely reluctant. Why do you want to pressure and manipulate someone who has clearly told you he’s not on the same page as you?

Post # 5
Member
8601 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Hes telling you clearly he doesn’t “believe in” marriage. I don’t get that phrase…it’s not Santa Claus, it’s a very real thing he just doesn’t want it. Don’t settle for a marriage for immigration purposes… He’s just going to be an ass to prove to you you’re not “really” married, he never wanted this bla bla bla. Time to move on. The right man will want nothing more than to marry you.  

Post # 6
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Not sure why you’d want to force a person to marry you.  Not sure why a person would want to marry someone who’s trying force them. Sounds like it would be a horrible start to a marriage. 

Post # 7
Member
7440 posts
Busy Beekeeper

From what you have said in the past it sounds best for your future to not rely on this guy to change, it is best do what is right for you. If that means going out of state for school then do so

Post # 8
Member
7965 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Based upon this and your previous posts this just doesn’t sound like an ideal match for either one of you. Some relationships we’re just meant to learn from. When it’s right it shouldn’t be this hard. 

Post # 9
Member
1221 posts
Bumble bee

With each post you write, this relationship becomes more and more depressing. It shouldn’t be this hard. This guy doesn’t want to marry you. You know how I know that? He FREAKING TOLD YOU THAT. 

Have a little self respect and leave him.

Post # 10
Member
826 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

He told you he doesn’t want to marry you.  Don’t be childish and play games.  Leave. 

Post # 14
Member
1221 posts
Bumble bee

So he would marry you so you could stay in the country? How romantic. Why do you want to marry a guy who so clearly doesn’t want to marry you?

Also, the fact that you are making up entire stories about applying for programs in other states just to get him to commit to you should tell you everything you need to know. This is not a healthy relationship. If he does marry you it won’t last. 

Post # 15
Member
8601 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
clarissabee:  yes I know it’s that way for you- but you said for him if it happens at all it’d be for immigration period. He made that clear- you need to believe him.

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