Post # 1
So, my Fiance and I were planning our wedding for 2011, fell into some financial hardship, and pushed the wedding back until 2013. Back in 2010 I asked three ladies to be my bridesmaids. Things got put on hold [like I said], and now I no longer want one of my friends to be a bridesmaid. We’re still friends, but we’re nowhere near as close as we were two years ago. I rarely ever see her, and we only ever communicate via facebook. I would like to ask a different friend to be my bridesmaid instead.
Also, the original bridesmaid’s son is who we want for our ring bearer. I’ll have to ask her about him at some point, and I’m afraid the topic will come up about how she was supposed to be a bridesmaid two years ago.
My question is, do I even need to address this with the original friend, since it’s been two years, or just ask the three ladies I would now like to be in the wedding party? If it needs to be addressed, how do I go about doing that nicely?
Post # 3
I absolutely think it needs to be addressed but I have no advice as to how to go about it considering I’m not fond of dumping bridesmaids. Regardless of how long your wedding is pushed back, you still asked these girls to be your bridesmaids so I would imagine they all assume that they still will be when you eventually get married. I can’t imagine your friend would be overly thrilled with having her son be your Ring Bearer when she’s been fired from her role but I guess it depends on how laid back she is.
Post # 4
Honestly, I’d just not say anything about unless she brings it up. If you’re not close any more, she may not feel comfortable being a Bridesmaid or Best Man either so she may not even ask you about it.
Post # 5
That is a difficult situtation. If I was asked to be someone’s bridesmaid and then we fell out of touch or were no longer as close and then I was invited to their wedding and saw them with their bridesmaids but they never mentioned it to be after the initial asking I would be hurt. I think you certainly need to talk to her about it but it could be the end of your friendship.
Post # 6
I think that since you asked her, even if it was 2 years ago, that you need to honor that. If she wants to step down that’s another story.
Post # 7
@letterlove: I agree totally