- 10 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
I am a new waiting bee here(have posted about my story like a month ago) but today I am writing about my best freind in the waiting.
My friend is the same as me (27 yo) and her bf is 28 or 29. They’ve been together for more than 3 years, not living together but spending all their free time together. She is a girl who always wanted to be married and have children. A few years ago she said she was setting a deadline in her head if her bf didn’t propose by this time she would move on. Clearly it didn’t happen and they’re still together. She claims that she “sees” something in him which leads her to believe he is worth waiting for. or something.
During the course of their relationship they have had numerous talks about marriage and kids which led to tears on both sides etc etc… Mostly because the bf didn’t think he would ever want children and also for marriage he could care less. They almost broke up once. For the past few months though, it sounded like he could be warming up to the idea of marriage, but nothing concrete. From what she describes, he is sending mixed signals. He would say something like ‘I was thinking of proposing you when we go to this place”. But still, it is clear that he doesn’t see himself having kids.
So recently, they were also having other problems related to his character/personality causing her a heartache. And although she was not pushing the issue of marriage herself, her parents started to push HER to push HIM. Basically the parents told her to break up with him if the two won’t be married by the time she’s 30. So after debating whether or not to mention this, she decided to talk to him about it with how her parents are telling her to move on if….
That was last weekend and it sounds like he is in his cave and really is pushed further on the edge of a cliff… She tells him that she wishes to solve this issue TOGETHER and asks to meet him but he says he can’t handle the situation just like that and he needs his space to think.
It sounds like a really tough situation for both of them to be in…
I know his personality is of a geek and he’s not a social person or expressive of his feelings at all so I can understand how hard it must be for him too…
I really have NO idea of what the future holds for them at this point. I’m hoping he decides to come around and gives her a specific timelines. But I am also prepared to hear him say he just can’t be ready now and doesn’t know when he’ll be, which means she could either man up and move on or drop the marriage and just be with him…
sorry this has been so long.
but, if you have any experiences or words of wisdom to share, please do!