First off… CONGRATULATIONS at getting to this wonderful point in your Relationship… that is worth a celebration on its own… what a FABULOUS feeling to come to the realization that you’ve found THE ONE, and you BOTH want to spend the rest of your lives with each other.
Ok, the whole ERing / Proposal situation…
I would NEVER be the gal who let my guy pick out something for me that I was going to wear 24/7×365 the REST OF MY LIFE
(Not clothes… and certainly not something as important as a Wedding Ring)
** And for the record @Samantha_MT: I am over 50… and an Encore Bride and even back in 1980 with my first Marriage, we chose the Rings together **
So ya, having a guy do it 100% on his own… is ok for some gals… but NOT the norm for everyone
(And can’t tell you how many times we’ve seen posts here on WBee from gals who are completely saddened by The ERings they received cause they left it entirely up to their guys without a peep of input… not a good idea. Guys need info)
So OP, if you and your fellow are talking marriage then you have some choices…
And they all start the same way.
1- READ UP. Become familiar with the various options for ERings… there is a lot more choices today that JUST a Diamond.
A good place to start is right here on WBee with THE RING BOARD.
2- No matter what you choose… but more so if you want a Diamond do your research. Diamonds are complicated… and expensive. So be sure you know all you can about this option. There is sooo much to know… the traditional 4 Cs:
CARAT SIZE – CUT (Shape & Quality) – COLOUR – and CLARITY
But there are also other Cs that can be equally important:
CERTIFICATION – CONFLICT FREE / CANADIAN – COMFORT – and COST
Within each Category there are many levels… so with so many variables it can get COMPLICATED. So you have to find a COMBO of Cs that meet you and your Finace’s happiness with both the Ring and Budget.
A good place to start to learn about Diamonds is the Website that Blue Nile has. They have an excellent page on EDUCATION (not just on Diamonds.. but they excel at on-line Diamond info). AND the Blue Nile Website as a Retailer also means you can check out the price for loose diamonds… and play around with the various combos to get an idea of what things might cost.
Blue Nile = http://www.bluenile.com
Although personally, I won’t buy a Diamond off-line, because I insist with such a purchase that I actually SEE the Diamond under a Jeweller’s Loupe BEFORE I buy. But there are certainly Bees here on WBee who have no qualms buying a Diamond on-line.
3- TRY ON RINGS. There are literally 1000s upon 1000s of ring designs… and not every ring is gonna look great on each girl / hand… because just like the rest of us… not everything suits / fits all of us (ie a Size 12 Dress can fit a gal who is 5 Foot tall OR 6 Foot tall… but not necessarily all gals inbetween). You try on clothes before you buy them… so it is with ERings… go try them on !!
You can do this on your own, or you can do it with your GFs, or your Fiance. The choice is yours.
4- IF you go as a couple there is the advantage to the fact that you are taking on this exercise as a couple… sort of the first serious step towards Marriage and planning your Wedding. And it can be a good exercise cause you’ll have to deal with / balance out various things… like all the possibilities… but also what combo of Cs are important to both of you… and your Budget limitations. Probably one of the first serious money talks that many couples have.
5- Take your time… do your homework, research & reading… and window shopping. Don’t buy the first ring you see in the first jewellery store you go into. TOO MANY MEN SHOPPING ON THEIR OWN tend to make this mistake, and regret it to some extent later. The ERing Market is competitive, and AGGRESSIVE… you will be pressured by Sales Staff… accept this for what it is, and don’t fall prey to their push tactics. BUY ONLY when you are both 100% happy. And you’ll have no regrets about the entire experience.
6- Ok after all the eye-candy… it’ll be the time to make a final decision. If you have shopped with your Fiance, chances are you’ve already picked out a ring together. If you didn’t shop together, then you’ve probably narrowed down your choices to a few you like (SPECIFIC RINGS) or at least a ring style.
This is when you give him the list of details… and let him make the purchase.
7- Now you wait. If you picked out the ring together the wait may be particularly short… as it may be just a case of the Ring being ordered / resized.
If you picked out the ring, and he’s gone off to buy it on his own, well you aren’t really 100% sure when that might happen. And so it goes.
He might have the funds right away… he might have to save up. The timeframe is very fluid… therefore on when the Ring & Proposal might happen.
8- The Proposal may come when the ring is in his possession… or in some cases many gals (myself included) don’t get a big showy Proposal… and it is just an ongoing conversation for a couple about Marriage. In that case, the day the ring comes in, could be the day it happens… in our case we went to the Jewellery Store, and he slipped it on my finger… and voila we were OFFICIALLY Engaged.
In any case… Enjoy the process. It is different for everyone… but it can be a very happy and rewarding experience.
Hope this helps,