(Closed) A Prenup?! Now?!

posted 11 years ago in Money
Post # 47
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

As a lawyer, I feel indifferent towards a pre-nup, but I also know that I have assets to protect and I wouldn’t be offended if my SO wanted me to sign one.  If I were to miraculously transform into a heinous beast and cheat on him, he has the right to be protected.  Same goes for me.  I would not pitch a pre-nup in the event of no-fault divorce, but if there is such a thing as constructive abandonment or infidelity at play, I want myself and him to have mutual protection from each other.  If its based on a fault-divorce, then no harm, no foul, its just like knwoing that if you cheat on your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re getting kicked out of the house.  No different putting it in writing.

Post # 48
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would not sign a prenup, unless as previous posters have said there was significant family wealth that needed to be protected. 

The fact that he wants you to sign a prenup due to your recent behavior is a HUGE red-flag for me. His reasons do not seem legitimate and I would be very concerned. What will happen during stressful times in your marriage? There are likely to be many times when you are stressed out (work, babies, etc) and his first thought should be comforting and supporting his wife, not ‘good thing we have a pre-nup!’

Maybe I’ve read your situation entirely wrong, but I would be wary. It could just be the stress of the wedding (FI and I have gone a little nutty at times too!) but I’m just saying you should look into the situation a little more before signing anything.

Post # 49
5427 posts
Bee Keeper

I am devastated that my mother wants me to do a prenup!

We, both of us, don’t want one. I believe that marriage is for life, and what we accumulate during the marriage is both of ours. What we accumulated before the marrriage is not ours, but his and hers… Wouldn’t the lawyers think that way?

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