(Closed) A question for photographers (or anyone who has been in this situation)

posted 6 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
Member
2553 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Ooooh I was in that situation except the family friend photographer just did headshots for high schoolers on the side. Ack. FHs mother had already asked her to be our photographer without running it by us first. I just told his mom that we actually wanted to go with a real wedding photographer and let her figure it out (how to tell the lady) since she was the one who had asked. His family was  upset because she was offering her services for “free” but w/e. Your situation is more complex though. If she is a professional, I would just tell her you went with another photographer. Not sure what other bees would say though.

Post # 4
Member
6581 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Tell her the truth.

Hi Photographer! Thanks for getting back to me. I know you recently moved and things have been busy for you, but I wanted to let you know that we decided to go with a photographer local to us that was more in line with our budget. We were really feeling the pressure to get a photographer nailed down, as our date is fast approaching, and it seems they book up very quickly. 

If she’s truly a professional, it won’t be a big deal. A lot of my friends/family have and are getting married. Several of them inquire with me, a lot of them don’t book. I don’t expect them to take it personally when I don’t give a discount, so I don’t take it personally when they opt for someone else. It’s business, not personal. 

Post # 6
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

i have a friend who is a photographer and everyone assumed that he’d be the photographer for our wedding (as did he). i decided to go with someone else as i prefer someone to be a guest OR working, not trying to do both.

compromise was askign him to do engagement photos and the civil ceremony, and the rest was done by the other photographer (catholic wedding as is seperate here in mexico, and reception)

i think starfish has the right idea, + 1 to what she said!

edit i realised i didnt finish the sentence “and the rest…”

Post # 7
Member
6581 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@BeachBride2014:  There isn’t really much she could do to pursued you at this point, because you’ve already signed with someone else. However, if you feel comfortable doing so you can always let her know that her lack of response was a deciding factor with your decision to go elsewhere.

A lot of photographers won’t or don’t want to shoot weddings for friends or family. The potential for disaster is sometimes too great. She might be one of those people, but even so, she should come out and tell you not ignore you.

I personally *hate* when family interfere with my business. Our family knows I’m a wedding photographer, and it makes me uncomfortable when they suggest someone use me. Choosing a photographer is a personal choice based on style, price, and compatibility…and I never want ANYONE to feel like they need to use me. I hope she feels the same way, but even if she doesn’t, I wouldn’t sweat it. As a pro, we have to have a thick skin and if she doesn’t she better get one…lol.

Post # 8
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

This is business and I don’t think she should have her feelings hurt. Just be direct and honest with her. I have friend who is a professional photographer and I didn’t hire her. I was honest about it.

Post # 9
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I would just lay heavily on the money factor in explaining your decision. Thank her for her willingness to help you guys, but explain that you found someone in your price range. She’s a professional–not just someone who does this as a hobby–so she’ll probably understand. Especially since she was so patchy with responding!

 

Post # 11
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@BeachBride2014:  oh i wouldnt watn to give instructions to a friend either!

also, my issue was partly (and no idea if this is standard of im a hard ass) that if someone is there to work then i dont think they should be drinking from the open bar and should be sticking to soft drinks. and not really dancing/socialising much. and i didnt want to have to say “hey, lay off the whisky until the main photos are done please”!

Post # 13
Member
6581 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@newname_99:  Ditto. I have to carefully reiterate to my family/friends who want me to shoot their weddings that I’m either a guest or working, not both. Rarely do I *ever* deviate from that. You can’t be hanging out and working, it just doesn’t work like that. T

 

he only exception have been a couple of weddings, one where my Darling Husband was the best man. Towards the end of the reception during the dancing my second shooter handled things for a few minutes while I danced with my Darling Husband. The other is my brother’s wedding coming up. They are adamant about me shooting, and so during dinner and family formals my second shooter will take over for a bit. However, they are having a super small family only wedding so it won’t be that bad.

Post # 14
Member
923 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Ugh.  For my first wedding, my uncle (who was an aspiring photographer) did my pictures.  They weren’t all that great.  This time around my mom suggested that I use one of her friends.  This woman does the little league pictures on the side.  And to top that off, she’s not very nice when she does them.  No thanks. 

Post # 15
Member
1586 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I was in this situation also… when she found out i had only told her that we didnt want her to work our wedding. 

Post # 16
Member
1314 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2006

Just tell her you’ve already signed a contract.  Once a contract is signed any photographer will understand that you’re a dead lead.  Just make it short and sweet.

 

The topic ‘A question for photographers (or anyone who has been in this situation)’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors