(Closed) a rant about wedding gifts

posted 6 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’m sorry I couldn’t even get through your post without thinking the worst of you. I get that you need to vent and this may be something in my future also, but really maybe some people thought you would just appreciate that they brought something. Also there may be guests who are having a tough time finacially or have better priorities with their money than what ever was on your registry. I know you are frustrated, but you really need to think about this two steps to the left and consider what is going on in their lives. Material things are not worth the frustration you seem to be feeling.

Post # 4
Member
3104 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

This is so unimportant and you sound really terrible. You need to learn to be gracious. Not fake gracious but truly in your soul. It really is not about the gifts. 

Post # 5
Member
7904 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I get where you are coming from to a point, but you are definitely taking it too far. I have no problem with someone giving me a cheap gift or even something homemade. It’s the thought that counts. The only thing that upsets me is when there isn’t even a card. I do, however, find it annoying–though not to the same degree as you–when people shop off registry for somethign that’s not even special or interesting or specifically reflective of us as a couple or our relationship with the gifter. I have no idea what to do with 2 of the gifts we got other than keep them for a polite amount of time and then put them in the garage sale or donation pile. I’m not mad or disappointed in the givers, though. I mostly feel bad that they spent money on something we simply will never use.

Post # 6
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

How pleasant.

Post # 7
Member
5963 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Well, that just happened…..

Post # 8
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Actually, I would respectfully disagree with the PP – I think that these boards ARE the place to vent.  Obvioulsy, we would never rant about this IRL (I am pretty sure the OP tried to get that point across).

But yes, we all get those “odd” gifts (BTW – I got several odd/duplicate gifts from a store called Kohls….not only did we not register there, but apparently this store only gives store credit….and there are none of these stores near where I live….so I ended up giving my mom ~$100 in store credit since I won’t be using it).

And yes, it can be annoying.  Sometimes, I feel that these folks just meant well, and our styles/circles/etiquette/etc. are just really different.  But sometimes, it does seem a bit shabby (re-gifting horror stories, anyone)?

So, I say, go ahead and rant!  Just do it here, and not IRL!  IRL, we stay gracious for the gifts we receive!

Post # 9
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Everyone gets bad gifts at times. I personally suck at giving gifts to people whose lifestyle is completely foriegn to me. If you are interested in the farm lifestyle easy if you are into modern urban stuff impossible lol. Also times are tough. Many people are struggling to just pay bills. Try to focusing on all the positive things about your day instead of the things that didn’t go the way you would like. 

Post # 10
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

If you’re insulted about gifts, you really don’t deserve them at all. If you’re going to judge people by the perceived quality of their gifts, you shouldn’t have invited those people to the wedding.

Most people pay for their weddings out of their own pockets these days. That is absolutely no excuse for you to be crass and tacky. The way you think of your guests is the really insulting part, and clearly it’s you who doesn’t care how you’re perceived.

You didn’t go into this to make money, yet you expect people who can’t afford a gift that you deem to be good enough to offer time or services. You’re expecting people to pay for the priveledge of attending your rocking party? That’s not what it’s about.

You shouldn’t have registered, you should have required a cover charge instead.

Post # 11
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

‘Cheap’ may not be cheap to them. They probably gave what they could afford? How much was the cheapest item on the registry? It may have been too expensive for many of your guests. A registry is just to give them an idea, they don’t HAVE to buy something off that list, or anything at all for that matter.

Post # 12
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I love when people have gift registries, it makes gift giving so much easier. I always buy from the registry when I can (or once when the registry was sapped I just gave a gift card to that store, assuming they like to shop there). 

But I didn’t know it was bad form to bring boxed gifts to the event. Isn’t there always a table for gifts? For a recent wedding I sent the gift to the house but unfortunately it required signature and didn’t get delivered for a few days! I was nerve racked thinking it would get returned to the store. I guess the lesson is to plan way ahead so the gift is delivered long before or after the wedding.

Post # 13
Member
2523 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Check yo’ self befo’ you wreck yo’self.

Post # 14
Member
504 posts
Busy bee

I’m so curious about these gifts exactly.

Can you elaborate on exactly what awful, unthoughtful gifts you received?

Post # 15
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I received a horrible gift once. Two live goldfish that I managed to kill in a week 🙁  It was an interesting gift lol

Post # 16
Member
334 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I too am curious about how you’re defining insulting gifts. Like gifts from your own registry, or just a roll of toilet paper or what?

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