A story about a cheap boyfriend

posted 1 year ago in 20 Something
Post # 16
1826 posts
Buzzing bee

Good for you! You made the right choice. 

In my experience when a guy I was dating was low on funds and needed to split something he would calmly say he was a bit low at the moment. But a guy who never pays, offers no support when needed by you, and reminds you the dinner he did pay for was expensive??!! Gross. I want to be with someone who is giving as I am the same way. With my boyfriend we are both givers so it naturally works out that we are always happy because we both feel like we are giving as much as we are getting . 

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icanteven19 :  

Post # 18
725 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2007 - City, State

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icanteven19 :  Gross….no you’re not wrong, what a fucking turn off. Did he whip out his calculator for a 10% tip as well? Ugh gross.

Post # 19
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I thought you broke up with him? If so, stay broken.

but, is it possible that he himself feels low on funds hence his tight fistedness?

Post # 21
4980 posts
Honey bee

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icanteven19 :  Very bad idea. Stop with the texting. It just delays you getting over his cheap ass.

Post # 22
272 posts
Helper bee

I would have done the exact same thing. Cheapness irritates me to no end. It makes me CRAZY. Like why? WHY would someone that cares for you not treat you to something nice when it would mean the world to you and not hurt them in the least? I don’t understand it. As someone that loves to spoil my family and friends, I just think it’s wierd to deprive you of a special treat and deprive himself of the gratifying feeling of putting a smile on your face. My reaction probably doesn’t fit the crime, but I just think being cheap (not to be confused with being broke-totally different) is WEIRD!!!!

Post # 23
1536 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2021 - Kauai, HI

Yes you did the right thing ending that.  My SO is a self described cheapskate.  He buys clothes a savers or goodwill (but always looks nice).  He uses coupons at fast food restaurants and loves a good motel 6.  

But…he compromises.  He’ll always stay in a more expensive hotel if it matters to me and is always willing to split the cost.  He always makes special occasions special and he is not cheap on vacation.  Day to day we try to be cost conscious and he gets so excited when I tell him about great deals I got.  I’d say he’s frugal, and he really prioritizes my feelings.  You deserve that.  But also I think it’s important to know that I ask for what I want.  He’s not big on celebrating but I told him that birthdays, Christmas and Valentine’s Day are important to me, so he goes all out for me and always makes me feel like it’s his pleasure to do it.  You deserve all that and more!  

Post # 24
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2029

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icanteven19 :  You absolutely are not wrong!  I’ve determined that people like that aren’t money smart, they are extremely selfish.  You do not need to have a guy like that and if you wait for the right guy, he won’t treat you that way.

I dated a guy like this, but he was broke.  Him being broke was a result of his own laziness and bad spending habits.  It annoyed the crap out of me when he would always bring up how expesive this was or how cheap that was.  We were long distance, he moaned and groaned about how much he spent despite only having to pay for the flight (he got free food and stay).  My partner and I share finances and never cheap out on each other.

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