Post # 1
So my fiance is Catholic and wants the marriage to be recognized by the catholic church. Are you ready for the catch, my parents are Presbyterian Ministers (as is my sister and aunt) and the expectation is that my folks will perform the cermony, which I think sounds awesome! However, in order for it to be ok by the catholic church a priest has to be there. I get that we will need to have the ceremony in a church and have prematrial counseling but does anyone even know of a NYC Catholic Priest who would even do a mixed ceremony (the closer to Long Island the better)
Post # 3
I don’t think it’s a matter of who “would” do the marriage; for a Catholic priest to do a marriage outside a Catholic church, you need a special dispensation from the bishop himself.
Post # 4
I believe in a catholic ceremony, there can be a priest and a pastor present. The priest would be the main officiant and the pastor could give the blessing. I would talk to his priest and see he if is willling to do that.
Post # 5
Maybe post this in the local boards.
But – the scenario you describe isn’t all that uncommon (if a pastor from another church performs a wedding in another church, usually it’s required that a pastor from THAT church co-officiate).
Post # 6
The trouble is his priest says no, he won’t have it at the church unless I not only promise to raise my children catholic but am not a competing religion as well. A catholic church is fine for the venue, whatever, I just want James to be happy.
Post # 7
@Fochizzy:That is not (or should not) be true according to official Catholic teaching. Technically, in a “mixed marriage,” only the Catholic party has to agree to “raise the children Catholic to the best of their abilities.”
Post # 9
You can get a “dispensation from canonical form” from the Catholic church. This means that you will have a valid, recognized marriage in the Catholic Church’s eyes. You can read about it here: http://foryourmarriage.org/catholic-marriage/church-teachings/interfaith-marriages/ A priest does not need to be present for it to valid, nor does it need to be in a Catholic church. You could get married in your home church with your parents and it would still be valid (with that dispensation!)
Option B would be to get married in a Catholic Church. In that case, your ministers wouldn’t be allowed to co-preside, but could say something during (or give) the homily, or say a prayer.
Also you don’t need to promise to raise your kids Catholic. Only the Catholic spouse does that.