(Closed) A rock and a hard place – SIL's bachelorette party or high school friend's weddi

posted 3 months ago in Parties
  • poll: What event should I choose?
    Bachelorette party for SIL : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Wedding for friend : (74 votes)
    99 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    1449 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2019 - City, State

    I would go to the wedding. A bachelorette party is fun, but really not that important in the long run. Your friend’s wedding is more important and I’d expect that your Future Sister-In-Law would agree.

    Post # 3
    Member
    745 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    Wedding > bachelorette. You can celebrate your SIL’s wedding at her wedding.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2829 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    bluebee19 :  I can’t imagine skipping my friends wedding to attend a bachelorette party…

    Post # 5
    Member
    9375 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2016

    Wedding trumps bachelorette party.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2356 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Wedding.  

    If your SIL is upset, ask her how she would feel if you skipped her wedding to attend someone else’s bachelorette party.  

    Post # 7
    Member
    905 posts
    Busy bee

    bluebee19 : wedding bc, it was a foraml invite, and it is an actual major event. This friend seems like a close friend as well, not just any friend. 

     

    Bachelorette party was an informal, last minute invite. Just politely decline and say you have already made plans, but cant wait for her wedding 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    2624 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    Wedding trumps bachelorette for sure, especially if you heard about and committed to the wedding first. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    11469 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    This is a no brainer. A bachelorette party is not even in the same universe of importance. It’s an optional and minor pre-wedding event, not even approved or “officially” recognized by etiquette. Anything other than a local night on the town would be a no from me in any case. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    3090 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2021

    bluebee19 :  a bachelorette party is not nearly on the level of a wedding… I can’t even wrap my head around this being a difficult decision…. 

    Obviously, go to the wedding… 

    Post # 11
    Member
    4825 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I don’t think it’s a straight wedding over bachelorette question. I would pick my best friend’s bachelorette over a distant friend’s wedding. In your case you knew about the wedding in advance and you aren’t even that close to Future Sister-In-Law so it seems like a clear decision to pick the wedding, I’m actually surprised you are torn on this. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    410 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    Go to your friends wedding, this is an important milestone that you can celebrate with her and wont likely get the chance again.  A bachelorette party is fun but is nowhere near the importance of a wedding. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    3090 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2021

     

    zzar45 :  the only way I would ever choose a bachelorette (or any other pre-wedding party) over an actual wedding is if the wedding was one that requires travel and it’s a couple I’m not close enough with to justify traveling for. Basically, I would never skip a wedding for a bachelorette if I wasn’t already going to skip the wedding in the first place. It just seems absurd to even compare the two. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    4825 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I never compared the two at all, I’m comparing relationships.

    I would pick the person I was the closest to if it was an event that was important to them; bachelorette, birthday, vacation together etc over an event for someone else that I am not as close to. 

    Obviously other things come into it, if you verbally agreed to one I don’t think you can choose the other event months later for example. 

     

    sboom :  

    The topic ‘A rock and a hard place – SIL's bachelorette party or high school friend's weddi’ is closed to new replies.

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