(Closed) A small bomb was dropped…now we are at a crossroads!

posted 5 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 31
Member
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

If it’s that important for Brother-In-Law to be there I would change the venue (and state) completely to not sacrifice comfort of everyone to be sure a family member could be there 

Post # 32
Member
691 posts
Busy bee

You’ll just have to talk to your Fiance. You have 3 choices, which one do you want? Outside in October without the brother, inside in August with the brother, or move your wedding to an entirely different state and have it with the brother.

When you choose to have a destination wedding, you will have fewer guests coming. That’s just the way it is.

Post # 34
Member
3108 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Both August and October are in peak hurricane season, so there’s that. 

Post # 37
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Why Florida?? Where do you live? Where do your guests live?

Post # 38
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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milabeehappy :  Is he by chance an opera singer?  I worked in that business for 17 years so I have some insights about it.

Post # 41
Member
6536 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

If you want to do an outdoor beach wedding in August, you need to move it way farther north, like to New England; or west to central/nortern California (or even further north). St Augustine in August is like walking around inside someone’s armpit. Just hot sticky and gross, and the oldest parts of town smell icky on the super hot days too. You have to get north of New York to get decent weather that time of year.

Post # 42
Member
6345 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

I’m sorry Bee, this situation stinks. I get that your Fiance wants his only sibling to be there for his wedding, but is your Future Brother-In-Law 100% sure he’ll even be able to make it in August 2017? It would really suck to change all your plans and then find out he can’t come anyway. 

I would suggest doing an short outdoor ceremony and then have your reception inside. That’s what I did for our Puerto Rican Destination Wedding. We had a very short ceremony outdoors on the beach (like 15 minutes tops). It was super hot but everything looked beautiful. I also had the groomsmen wear simple white button down shirts with their sleeves rolled up and khakis. A few other weddings that weekend had their men in full suits and all our groomsmen thanked me for not putting them through that torture. My husband actually just wore white linen, it was lovely. And the BMs wore short dresses. Then after the ceremony it was off to the reception indoors full of wonderful air conditioning! 

Post # 43
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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milabeehappy :  OK.  Since you say he’s in Europe, is he on a fest contract?  Whether he is or not, he can absolutely get a release for his brother’s wedding for a few days.  Believe me, I worked for a huge international opera company and one of my responsibilities was getting singers’ releases approved.  This happens ALL the time.  And usually for much less important things!  

If you tell me more specifics I can tell you whether he’s bullshitting you or not.  But I PROMISE it is not true that he can’t come even if he’s under contract.  

Post # 44
Member
691 posts
Busy bee

It can still be pretty hot and muggy even in October in Florida. We vacation there often, and September is actually the hottest month, with October not too far behind, especially early October. You might be dodging a bullet anyway.

I’m not you, but if I was set on a wedding in St Augustine and it was a dealbreaker to have my FI’s brother there, then I would do some more research and try to find a lovely indoor venue. Getting married outside looks nice in pictures, but it’s really not that big of a deal. We were married outside, and it happened to be very hot and windy that day. We had a vow renewal indoors and it was lovely as well. There’s got to be a gorgeous indoor wedding venue for you there.

Post # 45
Member
1617 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

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sparklesalways :  Exactly.

Future Mother-In-Law tried to pull this. She wanted to go on vacation during when we wanted to have our wedding. She doesn’t work and therefore no strict schedule to live by. She can go WHENEVER she wants.

I told her too bad. I’m getting married ins ummer she can come or not come. Suddenly, her vacation was pushed back.

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