(Closed) a small person's vent

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 46
898 posts
Busy bee

Small person here. I have experienced some things due to my size but none of what you mentioned. I never feel like my meals are different portion, or seats being emptied for the obese, or having to take a specific seat on a plane. 

Designated middle seat in a car though? Yes. All the time. I guess I got over that. 

Post # 47
52 posts
Worker bee

cherryberrypie:  I completely feel you with respects to the flight problem! I’ve experienced several times that the flight crew have approached me to ask if I would please switch seat with someone, because the person in the seat next to the one they want me to occupy is obese and “spilling” into the other seat (thus not allowing enough room for an average sized person). I find it extremely uncomfortable, since I’m being called out in public and I don’t feel that I can say no, since that would just force the next petite person to be seated there (and I’d feel guilty the entire trip) and also it would add even more unwanted attention to the obese person who, I’m sure, is finding the situation even worse than me. Still, being squished against a stranger, obese or not, is highly uncomfortable.

Fortunately, this mostly happens on shorter, regional flights, since longer (and therefore bigger) flights usually have seat options with “extra room”, and in my experience obese people are very aware and considerate of their size. I cannot imagine how terrible it must feel not to fit in a “normative” seat, so I try to be as kind and friendly as I can be in these situations. Although obviously I would much prefer being seated with my SO or my family or whoever I’m traveling with.

Post # 48
1358 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2027

I designate the seat in the car to my children based on the length of their legs, not the size of their waist

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by  headoverboots.
Post # 49
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

cherryberrypie:  LOL um I totally get your vent. I’ve actually vented about this myself, I’m not pregnant so not sure specifically about the seat thing HOWEVER I TOTALLY agree with the restaurants giving you smaller portions, and on airplanes when people just take up my armrest or my airspace because I’m small!!! I SWEAR that I experienced Chipotle giving me less food than my larger Darling Husband, friends, etc and it’s not just there too, I can almost guarantee it happens at any place where they see me ordering while standing in front. And the airplane thing too, someone has said to me before “you’re so small~ can you just switch with me and take the middle seat? I need the aisle”. The answer is NO. I’m ok with moving to accommodate families sitting together, elder people who are less mobile, etc NOT because I’m just smaller. ugh bothers the heck outta me. 

Post # 50
9616 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I don’t get the big deal with moving seats on an airplane. I remember once the guy sitting in the middle was like 6′ 2 or 6′ 3 and the poor guy had his knees up to his chest! Of course, I switched seats with him. And yes, I usually sit in the middle seat on the back. Not a big deal, everyone else would be more uncomfortable there than me. Although these two things have much more to do with my height than my weight.

I’ve also never seen someone give up a seat for an overweight person, ever.

Post # 52
9042 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

[content moderated for personal attack]

Post # 53
334 posts
Helper bee

Everyone has different body shapes, different health reasons, just because a person is fat doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to sit down. What if they have a medical condition that isn’t related to weight? Same goes for thin people. Does it really matter at the end of the day? it’s just a seat. 

Post # 54
3203 posts
Sugar bee

cherryberrypie:  have you tried Via instead of the subway while you are pregnant?

Post # 55
1588 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I cannot believe the rudeness of peoples’ replies here. If a bride came just to “vent” about something, people would be all about just letting her let it out. But because this is a topic that triggers the insecurities of a majority of people who are overweight or obese, all of a sudden she’s entitled, she’s a bitch, she should suck it up. Her discomfort is not less important than the discomfort of others just because you perceive it to be less impactful. Literally think about what that means — people in this thread are saying that she should EXPECT to be uncomfortable and that  her comfort does not matter as much as others’ comforts. Asking for the same consideration as others is not entitled. Complaining when it is extended to others while repeatedly denied to her is not entitled.

OP, I’m a smaller person too and I have experienced all this and it sucks. Vent away girl.

Post # 56
467 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014


Haha oh man I feel you.  I’m 4’11”, 28  years old, and everyone thinks I’m like 15-18 yrs old.  And I lived/worked in NYC my entire life also, so I know how things can go downhil real quick, especially when it comes to public transportation.  Just because I’m tiny doesn’t mean u can squeeze yourself in by shoving me into a corner!    

Anyways, I also hate it when people take a glance at me and give me half the amount of food they give my husband (6ft, 180lbs).  Please.  I eat more than my husband.  What gives?  I want the rest of my food!

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