(Closed) A stressed-out Bride-to-be!!

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
3437 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

It doesn’t sound normal to me but I’m not a mental health specialist. Frustration with planning and anxiety are common but depression is something else. What exactly is it thats making you feel this way? The general thought of being married or specific issues?

Post # 3
Member
2617 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I remember being very stressed out at times due to certain parts of the planning, and that could get me down sometimes.  However,  I think cold feet and depression are different than being sad/stressed about planning.  Perhaps it might be a good idea to talk to a proffessional?

Post # 4
Member
1251 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
laura8080grace :  

I second what PP said.

Depression is not normal to feel before the wedding, in fact some brides actually feel lost AFTER because it’s like what do you do with yourself now. What is the source of your feelings bee? Planning for sure can be stressful and frustrating and every bride will tell you we all wanted to pull our hairs out; but what is causing the sense of sadness?

 

Post # 5
Member
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I get where you are coming from. Getting married is a HUGE life change. Perhaps you are mourning the loss of the life you will be leaving behind by getting married? I am getting married in June and the stress has really started to hit me. My mom mentioned yesterday that I really need to get on wedding planning (even though I’ve already done a lot), and it almost made me angry… like, can’t I get through the freaking holidays first!?

I second talking to a therapist to find the root of the issue. My Fiance has been going through something similar, but it is because his life is going to change in a big way after we are married…more-so than mine. We both own our homes, which are about an hour away from one another, and he will be leaving his home to move in with me. His home is right next door to his dad’s house/the home he grew up in, so he gets down when he thinks about leaving his homestead even though we both decided it is what would be better for us both. So while he wants to be married and share a life with me, he also gets sentimental and sad when thinking about how things will change. 

Post # 6
Member
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

View original reply
laura8080grace :  Oh no, bee, don’t be worried.

I had a version of “cold feet” before the wedding. It wasn’t about my husband, it was just that getting married felt so grown up and I’ve definitely been having some Peter Pan syndrome situation recently about growing up. The thing that comforted me was really thinking and realizing that I wanted to be with my husband forever and ever and ever, I’m just nervous of the “adultness” of it all. (contrary to how immature I sound, I am generally a mature and level-headed almost 27 year old)

I was also pre-emptively sad about the wedding being over MONTHS before it even happened! Turns out I was thrilled when it was over because it went so perfectly.

Address your feelings. Do you want to be with your Fiance forever? What are you upset about? When in doubt, talk to a pro!

 

Post # 7
Member
6960 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

View original reply
laura8080grace :  What exactly is making you feel depressed? Is it the idea of getting married? Or just the wedding part of it? Have you had a lot of stress in the planning stages? 

Post # 14
Member
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

View original reply
laura8080grace :  I get really bad anxiety where I overthing EVERYTHING and thin spin out of control and convince myself roses are blue and the moon shines during the day.  Then that makes me really depressed (I have mental health problems).  I don’t have cold feet, but I’m 16 months out.  Have I questioned myself? Absolutely.  But I know this is the right thing for me. I just have to not let the crazy part of me get out of control.

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