(Closed) A tough waiting period…

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: January 2011

@BellsforHer:I can definately relate! I used to be like that when I was waiting for my ring. One thing you can consider is that your boyfriend may know that you know you are waiting for a ring. My boyfriend knew that I was waiting and expecting him to giveme my ring, but my boyfriend also knew that I wanted to be surprised. So maybe yours is also waiting for you to stop expecting so he can surprise you!

Post # 4
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m sorry! I completely know how you feel. The waiting game is not for the faint of heart. Have you talked seriously about a timeline? The only reason I say seriously is because I remember talking with my now fiance, and we’d talk about getting married, but it was in passing. I took it as a serious thing, but he was just sharing thoughts, nothing set in stone. We did sit down about 14 months ago and discussed where we saw ourselves. He said he saw a proposal by the end of summer 2010. It was one of the hardest things ever to wait–I had some pretty good meltdowns from time to time! However, he kept his word, and even managed to surprise me :-).

Hopefully we’ll be reading your grad post soon!

Post # 5
Member
1893 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I feel you, girl.  Waiting SUCKS.  After my Fiance proposed, he told me he had the ring for 6 weeks already!  I could’ve killed him.  Do you know when you might want to get married?  When I got to the point that I knew the proposal was imminent, I started reasearching some dates and stuff, that helped to ease the anxiety a little bit.

Post # 6
Member
870 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Ugh. Tell me about it. Everytime the Boyfriend or Best Friend leaves to do errands on his own I think: “maybe he’s looking at rings”. And then he comes back with bags or explains what he was doing and I realize there wouldn’t have been any time to stop anywhere else. It really sucks. I just want to stop thinking about it completely for a while. 

Post # 8
Member
2871 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I can totally relate, my Fiance and I had a big gut wrenching talk about my feelings of not being engaged yet at the first of the year.  We both said we would like a fall wedding and wanted to get married before the year was up but I didnt have a ring or a proposal nothing was set in stone.

For 8.5 long months I looked at rings online everyday, and spend so many weekends/dinners/trips/holidays thinking is he going to do it now… how about now.. how about now already!  I spend so many days feeling let down and I spent countless hours questioning his love for me, I felt like I was being tortured! LOL

The waiting game totally sucks- just try to stay positive because you know its coming and when it does get there for you …honestly you forget about the waiting part! (I know I did)

 

Post # 9
Member
302 posts
Helper bee

@Taylor4: I know what you mean. Some days when I’m busy and he is free I hope that he is going ring shopping. But then he will send me a picture of his nephew bowling or he will call me from his friend’s house. So aggrivating!

The whole waiting game is KILLING me!! We are there–we have gone through soooo much in our relationship and we are now in a perfect place, I just need him to do it! Why won’t he just do it already!!? I wish it was tradition for the girl to ask the guy, then there wouldn’t be so much horrible waiting time… but I’m traditional, so wait I will.

Post # 10
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

Well since I am having a super happy, loving my relationship, kinda day (you know- in the waiting cycle!) I figured I’d chime in. (normally I feel too pessimistic, lol)

It will happen! Since the two of you seem to be on the same wavelength (wanting to get married), just let it happen naturally. Try to make yourself as excited as possible. The key to helping me be happy during this waiting period is for my bf to tell me about his excitement about the future and our marriage. That helps me soooo much and sometimes I need him to tell me nightly.

Last night the bf told me that we’re looking at two sides of the same coin. I think our relationship is absolutely perfect and so that makes me think we should get married; he thinks our relationship is absolutely perfect and likes it being just like it is.

Post # 11
Member
935 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@BellsforHer: I can understand why you’re getting antsy! The summer is coming to an end and most people need a year or so to plan. Also, I know my Boyfriend or Best Friend has the money for a ring so it’s not like they need extra time to save….the good news is it could be any day now, the bad news is you have *no idea* when it’s going to happen and that can be so hard. Especially for type-A control freaks like me πŸ˜‰

@panterapeach: Thank you for sharing! Another great example of the “waiting part” and icky/antsy feelings going away after the proposal.  It always makes me feel better to hear from engaged Bees who felt tortured and let down, but everything resolved in time.

 

Post # 13
Member
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Gah, been there.  Totally there right now.  Finances are fortunately not an issue for us so I was confused disappointed to find out he picked a date in DECEMBER to propose.  This after looking at rings for 8 months!!

Now that I know we’re getting married though… I eased up.  And also, ring shopping together was very enlightening!  I did find out my Boyfriend or Best Friend went to the diamond district here with a friend while on lunch.  But the direction he was going into wasn’t exactly what I was hoping for (or close to what we looked at). 

Hang in there.  Boyfriend or Best Friend explained to me because this is the only thing “he” gets to control, it’s on his terms.  I trust it will still be magical.  πŸ™‚

Post # 14
Member
935 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@BellsforHer: Wow you’re brave! I love surprises but I’m too much of a control freak to move in without knowing when we’re getting engaged/married. I understand how it could drive you nuts…my fingers are crossed that be proposes in time for your summer wedding next year.

Post # 15
Member
302 posts
Helper bee

@artichokesalad: “BF explained to me because this is the only thing “he” gets to control, it’s on his terms.”

My Boyfriend or Best Friend says the same thing, and while I really appreciate it, it SUCKS! He is taking his sweet time! I am very type-A and definitely a planner and just want to get on it, but I don’t feel like I can until he makes his move.  At least if they have that type of thinking, then they are also probably thinking of making it truly special since it is their “only thing.”

The topic ‘A tough waiting period…’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors