- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
Agh! I just need to vent for a moment.
My fiance got a text from one of his guy friends asking if he can bring the girl he’s been dating on and off. He has, on multiple occasions, referred to her as “just a fling” and “nothing serious.” Which is what we also assumed, because they’ve broken up and gotten back together multiple times. We’ve spent literally an hour with the girl — seems like a nice person, though she barely said anything to us. I don’t think she’s snobby or anything, she’s just 15 years younger than us and I think she was shy or maybe intimidated. I kept trying to engage her with questions about her classes (she’s in college) but I got mostly one- or two-word answers. I just got the sense that she had no idea to relate to us “old folks.”
Anyway, now we’re being put in the awkward position of being ASKED for an invitation to our tiny (45 guests) and intimate wedding. I think this is rude. And it gets better (worse) because the friend told my fiance that he’s going to bring her to town either way. (They live a couple of hours away.) So now we will look like giant a-holes if we don’t extend an invite. I honestly don’t mind having her there IF there winds up being room after RSVPs come in, whatever. But I think it is rude to flat-out ask for an invitation, especially because this dude KNOWS how small our wedding is.
Oh, and by the way, we even have a small section on our website that says something like “We’re so sorry but we aren’t able to accommodate additional guests due to the intimate nature of our wedding and the small size of the venue, but we know you’ll have fun with our awesome friends and family!” And we know he’s looked at the website, too. This guy!
My fiance is also annoyed and he says he now wishes he had never invited this friend, and that this is kind of the final straw that makes him realize how much they’ve grown apart. (This isn’t the first time we’ve been frustrated with this guy and his poor manners.) He handled the situation by saying “We’re at capacity but are waiting to hear back from RSVPs and will let you know if room opens up.”
Just had to vent. I get so frustrated because I am trying to be gracious and polite to people, but this guy is now putting us in an awkward position. It feels rude and slightly manipulative (and honestly, grow up dude, it’s literally three hours without your girlfriend AND you have other friends there.) Ok, vent over.