- 10 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
I was hoping some of you could offer advice on how to handle this situation. We have a family member on my side who suffers from verbal diarrhea. She is my aunt, moms sister.
In the past year she has insulted my fiancé, career, me getting married in the church, my wedding party choices, and the worse of all…she said my dress was low cut! (It’s not, I’m pretty traditional!)I really don’t think this woman is evil just really really rude. (Pretty much anytime you sit next to her you will be insulted over and over–think Ramona Singer on Real Housewives of NY!)
Normally, I would just let things roll off my back and remind myself that I only see this person once or twice a year tops, but the final comment about my dress was the straw that broke the camel’s back. She said “It’s a little low cut, you can see your breast, it definitely isn’t what I would’ve picked.” Ew! Who says that???
After my Aunt said these comments to me, my mom told her she upset me and she apologized. Only she apologized by saying “I’m really sorry I didn’t make a big deal about your dress–I’m just not into girly things.” Uh, hello? That isn’t what upset me, I don’t need you to make a big deal about my dress. What I am upset about is that you implied it was inappropriate! (Also, me being “upset that someone didn’t make a big fuss about my dress” can make you look a little childish in my mind)
FYI-It’s a sweetheart neckline, lazarro ball gown….perfectly classy and even if I went down the aisle in a leather mini skirt, who are you to judge?
When I said to her, “Thank you for reaching out, but I was never upset you didn’t make a big fuss about my dress. I’m upset you implied my dress was inappropriate,” she flipped out saying she has been trying to apologize and that she is “done” with me….my mother also took her side and said I’m over reacting.
I have to see this woman at my shower next month and then the wedding. After that it won’t be until the holidays. (She will show up. She says rude comments to every family member and still shows up at events.)
How in the world do I handle this situation? My thoughts are to just smile and nod, write any thank you notes, and hope she fades into the background. But I must admit, not being able to go off on a rant is eating at me.