(Closed) A Wedding On Hold

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

It’s your life and you have to do what you want.  Try thinking about it in an opposite sort of way.  What if you were being forced to marry someone, but you didn’t want to.  You probably wouldn’t do it.  Right now you want to marry someone, but you feel like you’re being forced not to.  It seems like you make your fiance happy, and he obviously makes you happy, and at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.  And if his mother really loves and cares about him, seeing him happy should make her happy.

Post # 3
Member
10413 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I think if you can just  act as if all is well, it will get better.  You know, ‘fake it till you make it’ sort of thing .  Just keep on doing what  you are doing , outwardly ignore any negative stuff she does.

Mind you, you need to know  Fiance is on your side – you do , don’t you?

Post # 4
Member
1099 posts
Bumble bee

I only see a few options, because you can’t live with this kind of emotional abuse (saying you’re not good enough, insulting you, etc.). Fiance can stand up for you by telling his parents to treat you like a decent human being, and by talking back whenever they say something bad to show them that this is unacceptable. Or you can cut them out of your life entirely, ie just refuse to ever see them again.

Talk to your Fiance about this. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

Post # 6
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2016

It sounds very tough to go through that. You sound like you are very strong, and have a really good attitude. And you don’t sound immature at all, based on what I read. 

Mothers in every culture can behave similarly around wedding time. I think she is still acting rude. I know that cultures are different in terms of marriages. But if you can try your best to respect his family, and he is standing up for you, then you two can make it work. 

The only difficulty I can see in the future in terms of obstacles, is if you and your fiance remain financially dependent on his mom. That could be stressful, but I guess you guys could (hopefully) work that out too.

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