Post # 1
I really really really don’t wanna do it 🙁 she asked me at her engagement party, even had her sister there to take photos while she asked, thinking I’d be ‘honoured’ and I’d burst into tears of happiness. Talk about peer pressure. I started shaking with nervousness at even the idea of having to stand up in front of 120 people, most of whom I don’t know, and worst of all having to WORK at my friends wedding. I want to be able to enjoy the night and reflect fondly on their wedding, not have nightmares of the bridezilla friend screaming down my neck the entire day for being 20 minutes off her timeline and never being able to speak to her again. She kinda knows I don’t want to but she insists on talking me into it. How do i get outa this? What should I do???? Aaaaaargh!
Post # 3
I didn’t know weddings had MCs. What all comes with the job?
ETA: Is it similar to a DOC or personal attendant?
Post # 4
@KellyLouise: HAHA I love the idea that she felt this “ask,” was a memory you wanted to treasure for all of time. It is sweet she wants you included…unless this is just her way to get out of hiring an actual MC. The best thing you can do, despite how uncomfortable you may find it, is to be completely honest. Honestly, you don’t owe them an explanation besides no, however, if you were close friends I would nicely explain how uncomfortable it would make you for the reasons listed. Just to keep the blood clean. If you wanted to soften it, offer to do another task she might need. Again, when it comes to responsibilities in somebody’s wedding you can really just give a yes/no.
Post # 5
@KellyLouise: Time is of the essence. I’d gracefully decline sooner rather than later, so she has alternate plans to pursue. Also, she’d have little reason to get mad at you for giving a definite no up front, rather than her thinking you’re “stringing her along,” (which of course may not be the case, but try to convince a bridezilla someone isn’t being inconsiderate).
Instead of saying you refuse to MC and leaving it at that, why don’t you think about what you would be willing to do for her (to show her there’s no love lost) but that doesn’t make you feel so “Johnny on the spot” for such a long time. Could you read at the ceremony? Could you sing a little song? Could you give a toast? A puppet show? Anything but MC the entire night will do.
Good luck with your friend!
Post # 6
Wow, I am surprised that she thought that it would be an honor. If I were asking that of one of my guests, I would definitely preface it with something like, This is a big responsibility, and I know that you might not want to do this… Oh well.
I agree with PP in that you should offer to do something else. If she’s a good friend, she will understand your anxiety of being in front of a huge audience, and understand that it was a lot of ask of you. I would just explain that you aren’t comfortable and then offer any job in which doesn’t involve talking to the whole wedding! 🙂 Good luck!
Post # 7
@ieatunicorns: Some weddings choose alternatives to a DJ. We are too. Though we are paying our friendor. Our venue has all equipment and we have the playlist on Fiance’s computer so our friendor is going to be hitting play and then making sure the songs play at the right time (2 playlists. 1 on shuffle all night and the other will be the special songs.) Thus he is consiered an MC. If a couple isnt having music or using an ipod or whatever they may use an MC.
Post # 8
So I’m thinking I’ll scour the Internet for MCs in our area and send her a list and offer to pay a portion 🙂 Ill offer to help with some DOC stuff. I know she thought I’d enjoy the role because I’m organised and love weddings, but just didn’t consider bridezillaness and public speaking failures. We had our DJ who was also owner of the restaurant do ours & it was So much nicer not having the ‘friend who bossed you around all night’. I don’t wanna be that guy!!
@ieatunicorns: i think the MC is to keep the timeline more than anything but they have a microphone & announce things like when cake is cutting etc. so kinda like a DOC with a mic. Friend MCs I think come across as being a bit bossy and they never get to enjoy the night as much. I am bossy but only behind closed doors lol
Luckily, she just told me last night. Might call her for a chat tonight and nip it in the bud
Post # 9
I really think that it depends on the person. I WOULD be honoured and excited to be someone’s MC. But I love public speaking.
You obviously don’t, so it isn’t so much of an honour for you. Perhaps your friend misjudged your like of public speaking? I would assume that she sees you as much more confident and outgoing than you feel that you are. At least you can take this as a compliment.
Post # 10
Down here it’s very common for the Best Man to be MC, because he’s got to speak at some time anyway. Oh wait, you’re Australian like me… just tell her what I told you, that it’s common for Best Man to do it. Anyway, decline as soon as possible if you don’t want to do it. Whether it’s the Best Man or not, the fact is she needs to find someone else.
Post # 11
As your weding gift to her, perhaps offer to pay for an actual MC?
Post # 12
@kerensa: theyre hundreds of dollars !!!! We’re not that close LOL
Thanks all for your suggestions. I just got a text so at least she doesn’t HATE me for implying I don’t want to, but we are still yet to have the talk. Will def suggest the best man, or maybe an uncle lol
Post # 13
@KellyLouise: It always seems to be a gregarious uncle who does this if it isn’t the DJ. Surely she has someone between family and the groomsmen!