Post # 1
My SO is so freaking sweet I could die. I am floored by how amazing he is to me and feel very very lucky every single day. That said… he is REALLY getting on my nerves right now. After his Toastmasters meeting on Monday he told me about a speech this woman gave on…something… maybe stress management? She taught them where their pressure points were and suggested mantras. They were all like “tap your hands against each other and say ‘Although I am stressed right now, I love and accept myself’.” He demostrated the motions and I said he looked crazy, like he had a nervous tick, and that would make me MORE anxious if I did it.
Fast forward to today- I have a MILLION things to do before I can leave the house & go to my hometown for a bridal shower I’m throwing tomorrow. I text SO that I’m having trouble getting moving because I’m so anxious about forgetting something. He sends me a pic of the pressure points hand out and tells me “Although I am anxious, I love and accept myself.”
What the actual fuck? First- I already told you that shit was not helpful to me. I told you it was annoying. Second- what the hell does me being anxious have to do with me loving myself?! My self worth is not based on whether or not I happen to be nervous about forgetting the favors today. WHAT?! I seriously want to scream at him. I know he’s trying to be helpful but COME ON.
Does your SO ever try to be helpful and end up making you want to punch things?
Post # 3
Yeah, I can’t really remember anything specific… but I hate when he tries to be helpful by telling something really stupid or obvious, and I’m like, yeah, I’m not that #*[email protected]#%ing stupid, there was no need to tell me that. He’ll just tell me he’s trying to help and I’m like that is something you might need to tell a 2 year old, but when you tell ME that, I just feel like you think i’m a total moron.
Post # 4
Hahaha the other day I got my haircut by someone who doesn’t usually cut my hair… and I was NOT happy with it. And our e-pics are in two weeks. (I know… crazy.)
FH was out of town on a business trip and I called him, hysterical about my hair, and he was like “Don’t worry hunny, no one will see your hair in our pictures.”
I just sat there for a minute and then was like “I love you and all… but this conversation is not helpful. I’m going to hang up now.”
Post # 5
@MexiPino: Mr. 99 told me I should, “Calm down” one time…..once the dust settled in our house and we were able to locate the dogs, the cat and what was left of the dishes I explained to him that saying that to me was the equivalent of me taking a shit on the hood of his car and that if he liked his face the way he was, he would say something along the lines of, “I can see you’re upset, what can I do to help?” next time.
Post # 6
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I find that men’s natural instincts are to want to help *solve* problems, not sympathize. This drives me crazy sometimes! I’m like, “Stop trying to fix it, just agree with me that IT SUCKS BALLS!” (Then he’s pretty good about telling me what I want to hear.)
Post # 7
@MexiPino: Lol too funny. I am very familiar with Toastmasters but I don’t think I’ve ever taken someone’s speech to heart that much hahaha. They’re like 7 minutes long.. you don’t actually learn anything! If he is serious about this tapping thing, he needs to actually learn how it works in more detail. Yeesh. Try suggesting that to him next time he thinks he’s being helpful!
Post # 8
Men want to solve problems when they’re presented with them. Women present problems because they want a sympathetic ear/comfort. It’s very common for couples to clash over this.
Post # 9
@canarydiamond: My honey takes EVERYTHING to heart, God bless him. 😛 Oh.. except, apparently, my grand declarations that something is stupid and completely useless to me… then he totally ignores that and re-presents the same information at exactly the wrong moment.
I love him. I really really do. 😛
Post # 10
@MrsRight: Bawahahaha. No one will see your hair! That is awesome.
Post # 11
When my fiance has moments of helpfulness, I’ve learned to take a deep breath and repeat to myself over and over ‘he means well’. And then I go vent about whatever was annoying me to one of my girlfriends.
Post # 12
@pinkshoes: Yeah… we had a big “problem” with him being too helpful. 😛 Well, for us, “big problem” means it was something I had to gently talk to him about more than once. But once he tried to buckle my seatbelt for me and I was like “SERIOUSLY?!”
Post # 13
@Nona99: I am so using that line on my Fiance next time, might add ‘while you’re washing it’
@MexiPino: Yes, Fiance is always so supportive and amazing and believes in me so much that sometimes, just sometimes, I want to punch him. I love him to death but whenever I am stressed about school his response is always: You are just too stressed, take a break and relax, we can go for ice cream and watch a movie. I know you have three exams, a presentation and a term paper due this week but you’re super smart and will miraculously score straight A’s because I believe on you *shits rainbows and looks at me with loving eyes* ugh I sound like a bitch but sometimes I just want to smack him in the forehead and scream NO it doesnt just HAPPEN and taking four hours of time I do not have to go on a break to “relax” is NOT RELAXING, getting shit done and out of the way is relaxing. But he is so sweet and loving I just smile and ask him to go buy me ice cream… goodness I love that man lol
Post # 14
@MexiPino: HAHAHAHA i think I would just sit there and go WTH was that and WHY did you do attempt to do it?
Post # 15
@MexiPino: lol, it sounds like he was trying to make you laugh…maybe…
My Fiance makes me want to scream when I’m upset and he starts talking to me like I’m 2 or crazy by speaking very calmly and slowly things like “baby, calm down.shhhh. it’s okay” OMG. hate.
Post # 16
@minipenguin: Oh you totally get me. Seriously- I feel like such a bitch sometimes because I hear other women complaining about their SOs being complete assholes and my complaint is that mine is too freaking nice & helpful! LOL Like, cry me a river, right? But holy hell!!! He knows my “comfort food” when I’m PMSing is those horrible cappuchinos from 7-11. You know, like out of the machine? So he brings me them sometimes, which is totally sweet. Except sometimes, when I’m actually stressed or upset about something serious, he brings one and I want to throw it in his face! LOL But I finally get the whole “My SO makes me want to be a better person” because he’s so freaking sweet that I don’t really GET to lash out a lot.