(Closed) About to say F*** this bridal shower. vent/rant

posted 3 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
5950 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

View original reply
myardley :  I’m so sorry that you’ve been put in this position and its tricky because as the hostess its really her perogative who to invite but you would think she’d be more than amenable to hosting the entire family since a bridal shower really isn’t THAT complicated.

It would appear she’s decided to make it that way, which is also her choice…but you have choices too.  As far as nickle and diming you over postage – that’s just ridiculous and in the age of e-vites unnecessary.  If she continues to pick on that issue solve it with a digital one.

Second, since she’s elected to be punitive and essentially give you the base package shower where you get cake, gifts and she promptly releases the hounds – how about you schedule an afterparty at a restaurant or bar and let your hair down your way with the guests you want without her influence?  Something simple shouldn’t be too hard to get the word out about…

 

Post # 3
Member
936 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

Hello darling my friend 🙂 I would tell your mom maybe having one shower for both families would be less of a hassle and you’d be able to enjoy the company of everyone at once.. Tell her It would make things easier if everyone was there to celebrate with you… I feel like your mom isn’t thinking about what you want she’s being selfish only intending on inviting one side and maybe you can tell her that in a nice way? .

I feel like that’s so harsh what she said about you opening your gifts having cake and leaving.. You’re bridal shower is suppose to be a memorable time for you with your loved ones and It shouldn’t be rushed. I would speak up and tell your mother that shes putting lots of stress on you and this is suppose to be a happy time for you right now… I’m sorry that you are dealing with all of this but this is ABOUT YOU!!! and you being the guest of honor shouldn’t have to be dealing with all of this B/S!! Do you have a maid of honor who can give your mother some input sometimes it’s better for someone to hear it from someone else when it comes to ideas maybe your mom will budge ? 

Post # 4
Member
263 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

your mom is wrong. i’m sorry, hon. it shouldn’t be this hard. <3

Post # 5
Member
3327 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Your mom is being awful. I’m sorry you have to go through this.

What I would do: Tell mom that if she isn’t going to cooperate and invite both sides, and follow your wishes (no games, no lingere, etc), that you will ask Future Mother-In-Law to plan the shower and will invite everyone from both sides. Make it clear that you only want 1 shower, and will not be attending any showers that are excluding your future family. Then its up to your mom to either play ball, or have your Future Mother-In-Law thrilled that she gets to plan it all.

I dont deal with peoples bullshit like that very well, and I’d rather nip her behaviour in the bud now, rather than her trying to keep everything separate and controlled to her standards once youre married.

Post # 8
Member
769 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
scissorgirl :  precisely. Either she acts like an adult or you simply don’t play her game and boycott the shower entirely. 

Post # 10
Member
766 posts
Busy bee

is it just me or does it seem like showers can get more complicated than the weddings themselves sometimes? I’m sorry this is going on. I guess worse case scenerio is that the shower is only one day, and if it doesn’t go well, it’s not a ongoing thing.

I hope it works out well for you!

Post # 11
Member
3327 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Sorry OP 🙁 I’d feel awful having a 1 sided party for no other reason than for my mom to exclude FIs family. Not cool.

Post # 14
Member
542 posts
Busy bee

i’m confused- step mom or future mother in law?

The topic ‘About to say F*** this bridal shower. vent/rant’ is closed to new replies.

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