(Closed) Accepting that I am going to be a fat bride

posted 11 years ago in Full Figured
Post # 32
Member
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I guess I am the only bride on here that don’t want to lose weight. If I lose it okay, if I don’t then oh well. Your fiance did not propose to youbecause you were a size 5 so don’t feel like you have to be a size 5 to be the perfect bride. Just like someone else said, the only thing that he is worried about is you coming down the aisle…that’s it. I love my size, and even though it can be discouraging to go try on dresses just find the right one for you and the one that makes you feel like yourself but made up. I hate that people are saying you have to be a certain way to feel like  bride, if that is the case, we all would be a size 5 , having our weddings on Saturday, at 4 in the afternoon, etc. Bee you, Bee happy, and enjoy being engaged and enjoy your wedding.

Post # 33
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

Im sure I may step on some toes here but im going to be honest. I 100% understand… I am a street size 18/20. I wasn’t this big until after my accident and 18 months of prednisone.. but I refuse to use it as an excuse. Im me.. big or small im still me. I am not going to fit into the “magazine” or “runway” bride mold.. but so what?! Im sure you look amazing in that dress and who cares what other people think? Dont feel like you have to be super skinny because thats what you usually see in bridal magazines. Im so proud of you for doing WW.. thats what im doing as well and it is a lifestyle change, but dont let it consume you. Your Fiance fell in love with you and wants to marry you.. so embrace that and be proud of who you are!

Post # 34
Member
1481 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

@Professor: We are all real brides no matter what size. You are going to be a beautiful bride and your husband is going to love you in your gown and every day. It is very tough with planning stress and holidays to lose weight…our wedding is in April too and I have a fitting this monday! Im nervous! I gained some from stress and holidays too but i got back on the exercise wagon and im trying to do my thing! But its def not easy…its easier to make excuses not to do it!! Good luck and keep your head up.

Post # 35
Member
49 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2009 - Phoenix Art Museum

I’m sure you will look beautiful and your groom will LOVE you in your dress! Just enjoy your day, feel beautiful, and dwell on the joy of your day marrying the love of your life!

Post # 36
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Spanx are your friend! Don’t feel bad. I think even “skinny” brides plan to lose a few lbs before the big day. It’s every woman’s mission to look fab on her wedding day, and you know what, you will!

 

Walking around in a wedding gown will make you look/feel like a princess, do not let your insecurities hinder your happiness on your wedding day!

Post # 37
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Don’t worry so much. Like so many others have said… He fell in love with you the way you are, that’s not going to change. 

I think we all feel like we HAVE to lose pounds before the big day. I’m right there with you, but… I’m OK with my figure, so if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t. Besides, if you shed a ton, you’re changing your whole look and you may not feel as comfortable in yourself in that new look by the time the day arrives. (that’s why I’m holding off on reduction surgery until after)

Post # 38
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@lilyfaith:”You know, all of us want to look our best, but your Fiance asked the you he fell in love with and spends every day with to marry him, and he will be ecstatic to see that you walking down the aisle. That is what matters. Besides, the “happy bride” glow does more than makeup or weight loss ever could.”

 

You just made my day! I was feeling a bit like the original poster,like something was missing. Like I was coming up short and a dissapointment, but what you said (over a year ago lol) really made me think. You’re so right! If he wanted a thinner girl he would have stayed with his ex. Thank you so much 🙂

Post # 39
Member
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Glad to find this thread tonight.  I also feel like a massive failure in this regard.  I feel like hiring photographers was a waste since pics with me in them will be gross.  I had lost some weight, but have gained it back with late night snacking during this month of insomnia (it’s 5:30AM and I’m up, but it’s because I haven’t went to bed).

Post # 40
Member
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Professor:  I’m really sorry you are feeling down about yourself! Like everyone else has said, your fiancé loves you no matter what your size is! 

But to make you feel better I will share what my fiancé and I do together to drop some lbs. In addition to us working out together every morning, we are also doing monthly “challenges”. This month we aren’t eating out, next month will be to incorporate veggies into every meal, the month after that is no sweets, etc. By doing these things together we can hold each other accountable, and we are super competitive. So when I get a craving for McD’s I just remember he hasn’t eaten any fast food and I don’t want to be the one to lose the challenge!

Best of luck to you!

Post # 40
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

I lost 20kg for my wedding over a period of 9 months.  Obviously not what everyone wants to hear on this page but it can be done even though it takes hard work and dedication.  Before I built up the determination to make a change, I would cry or get angry whenever family or friends would suggest I get a move on with choosing a dress.  Don’t be complacent – dedicate yourself to looking and feeling better and do it for yourself!  Your family and friends love you no matter what but you want to cherish your photos and remember the day for how fantastic you felt- not for how you were making a stand for plus size women or how you reminded the photographer to take photos only at certain angle! Your happy day can be so much better than that!- mine was. This was not intended to shame or troll anyone but merely to encourage and inspire. 

Post # 41
Member
1260 posts
Bumble bee

If it makes you feel any better, a real bride is a woman who is getting married. Weight isn’t a qualification. But if you’re not healthy right now, starting a new life with your Fiance could be great movitation to talk to a doctor and a nutritionist and get back on track.

Good luck!

Post # 42
Member
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Being a real bride has nothing to do with size. My fiance fell in love with the real me, wants the real me, and will marry the real me. I am sure you don’t expect him to change before the wedding, why would he expect that of you? 

Be your own, beautiful self. Always strive to be a better person, but love the you that you are now. 

Post # 43
Member
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Wow, just realized this is a six year old thread someone updated with a comment. 😏

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